Dispensary Corner

BELIEVE it or not, you can have your breast milk made into a permanent keepsake, in the form of jewellery.

However somewhat of a sticky situation has developed, with US company called Mommy Milk Creations, which produces the precious mementos (pictured), ordered to refund customers and return the breast milk they sent.

The court directive follows complaints by clients from as far afield as Singapore who say they’ve been waiting as long as two years to receive their promised creations.

YOU should always apply sunscreen liberally - but that didn’t work out too well for a man who was sunbathing in the nude in Townsville last week.

The male tourist is now recovering from serious injuries after a sea eagle mistook his sunscreen-lathered testicles for some tasty eggs.

The unfortunate chap was sunbathing at Saunders Beach, with a source at the clinic that treated him quoted by Foreign Journal as saying he completely lost one testicle in the attack, while the other remains “hanging by a thread”.

A witness said “while we definitely recommend nudists to use plenty of sunscreen, it appears in this case he slathered on a bit too much.

“Combine that with the fact he’d done some manscaping down there, and his balls looked like two perfect little turtle eggs”.