PLAY

FINAL FANTASY XIV ONLINE

Don’t like it. Never tried it. Every month we force one of our team to play their most feared game

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WHO?

I MOSTLY CULL THE LOCAL MONSTER POPULATION OR DELIVER ITEMS.

Malindy Hetfeld dislikes MMOs but loves Final Fantasy, and rave reviews for this one’s expansions, plus the fact she previously claimed to give any game a try, mean she’s giving it a go.

Curiosity is only natural when people around the world act as if director/producer Naoki Yoshida descended on the initially pretty broken Final Fantasy XIV like Jesus (Yesus? Yeezus?) and turned a horrible mess into an enjoyable experience. I was even more on board when I heard that this is an MMO where you’re largely independen­t if you want to be.

My time with the game, however, consists largely of wondering where all that amazing content is. After the initial onslaught of informatio­n aimed at getting me started, I mostly cull the local monster population. Or I deliver messages and items, being told there’s “no-one quite like me”, while other players queue behind me to receive the very same task. In other words,

I’m experienci­ng the thrilling life of a freelancer, only now through the eyes of a badass Roegadyn woman over six feet tall. That is, she would be badass if she wore any of the trimmings I’ve seen on players with irresistib­le names such as ‘Shadowmoon Velvetmoon’.

The Shroud, the area I’m exploring, is a pleasant-looking forest full of little nooks and crannies, but the quests doled out to me can’t seem to make the most of it. I try to emote at random strangers who help me with the monster slaying, only to end up ignored and oddly lonely for someone who wanted to stay independen­t, so I quietly go back to my deliveries. It’s relaxing just to complete a few undemandin­g tasks each evening, but so many other games have them, games that don’t promise to give me the good stuff only after I’ve persevered through mindless fetch quests for 80 hours. Come to think of it, I’ve played a game just like that before – it was called Final Fantasy XV. Forget playing postie; my next mission is to rejoin Noctis and co.

 ??  ?? I don’t know what other glorious adventures other players are up to in this beautiful-looking game, but I’m here to kick ass and take names… so I know who to deliver various letters to.
I don’t know what other glorious adventures other players are up to in this beautiful-looking game, but I’m here to kick ass and take names… so I know who to deliver various letters to.
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