NO PLACE LIKE HOME

Four places you wouldn’t want to grow up…

GRAYSTARK HALL Doctor Who’s “Day Of The Moon” visited this American orphanage, which had messages like “GET OUT NOW” scrawled on the walls, and Silents roosting like bats. Occupants: one, a little girl in a spacesuit…

ST LOUISE’S ORPHANAGE Darkseid minion Granny Goodness is not aptly named, given her use of brainwashing and torture. In Smallville’s “Abandoned” she uses her position as an orphanage administrator to wipe girls’ minds so that they can be trained as warriors.

COOKIEVILLE Futurama’s Leela grew up in this “minimumsecurity orphanarium”, with a warden who continually told her, “You’re worthless and no one will ever love you!” There were no books cos the kids were so hungry they ate them!

THE SANTA LUCIA SCHOOL The orphanage in Guillermo del Toro’s Spanish Civil War chiller The Devil’s Backbone probably wouldn’t be so bad but for two details: attacks from Franco’s forces, and a ghost boy with blood seeping, smoke-like, from a crack in his head… Yikes!