STRANGE PRACTICE

released 25 July 320 pages | Paperback/ebook Author Vivian shaw Publisher Orbit Books

You’d think a story about a specialist doctor who treats gothic monsters in London’s supernatural underbelly would write itself. Unfortunately, with Strange Practice, Vivian Shaw seems to have found it incredibly hard work.

The book gets off to a particularly bad start, as its heroine, Dr Greta Helsing, isn’t introduced in the middle of doing something interesting. Nope, she’s just parking her car. Actually, she parks it, gets out, and then struggles to close its decrepit old doors. The scene goes on for over a page of excruciatingly tedious waffle, at which point you’d be forgiven for giving up and finding something more exciting to read – like maybe the back of a shampoo bottle.

If you keep slogging through, eventually a plot about an order of mad monster-killing monks emerges, along with a hint of vampiric romance. With tighter prose (and less of the dull description of every stick of furniture) this could’ve been a half-decent romp, but there’s never any intrigue or sense of urgency. It’s obvious Shaw has read Terry Pratchett, but there’s none of his sharp, laugh-outloud humour here, just a bunch of immortal beings whining about their mundane existence.

Although it’s intended to kick-start a series, if this first outing is anything to go by, Dr Helsing’s practice won’t be in business long. Sarah Dobbs