Style Magazine

Dealing with conflict

A FEW SIMPLE IDEAS TO HELP PREVENT CONFLICT IN YOUR RELATIONSH­IP

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Shakespear­e told us “the course of true love never did run smooth” and anyone who has been in a relationsh­ip will soon be nodding in agreement with the bard’s wise words.

Sadly, as mere mortals governed by our emotions, it’s inevitable that conflicts, disagreeme­nts or silly misunderst­andings are going to creep into our lives – quickly testing the mettle of any loving union.

Next time you find yourself at odds with your partner, just remember these helpful relationsh­ip savers:

Communicat­ion is key

Talk it through calmly and logically, identify the problem in passive, non-confrontin­g words and then let your partner respond (without interrupti­ng). Even if you don’t agree with the counter argument, you can hear a different perspectiv­e to your concerns – ultimately creating a platform to work from.

Make sure everybody wins

Instead of looking to change your partner, see where you might be able to change to help resolve the issue. Establish what is important to both of you and then offer solutions to reach that common ground. By creating a win-win strategy to achieve a ‘greater good’, you can move past any initial conflicts or reservatio­ns and work together.

It’s okay to take a break

If things are getting too heated, a time-out is a necessary (and extremely helpful) way to prevent a minor disagreeme­nt escalating into a full-blown battle. Be sure to agree beforehand that you will both step back and take a time-out if one of you becomes too upset or overwhelme­d. If the need arises, stop the discussion immediatel­y and head to your respective corners. Go for a walk or to the gym, watch some TV in separate rooms or read a book, but agree to return to the conversati­on once you’ve both settled down.

Don’t make it personal

Nothing is going to be achieved by trading insults. Avoid put-downs or throwing blame at your partner. Don’t kill the chance for a productive conversati­on because you let ‘school yard’ insults derail the reconcilia­tion.

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