CAPTAIN AMERICA LANDS WIN FOR B-TEAM
TOO arrogant. Too under-strength. Too aloof. Too uncaring.
In the end, the bastards were just too good.
We call them that out of respect. It’s a term of endearment. USA’s vaunted basketballers were phenomenal at the Tokyo Olympics, after being awoken by a slap-in-the face loss to France in the group stage.
They took on the French again in the final at Saitama Super Arena on Saturday, and they had it all their own way - including the unusual starting time of 11.30am because that was prime time for the TV broadcast in the US.
No matter that it was 4.30am in Paris. C’est la vie.
The US won 87-82. Kevin Durant. He was something to see in the flesh.
Captain America. I could only just see him, all the way up there at 6”11’. But the softness of his hands, the lightness in his feet, the exquisite touch in his shooting and the starch in his defence was wholly mesmerising.
He just might have been the most insanely gifted athlete in Tokyo.
He played as if the opposition didn’t exist. Barely seemed to look at them or even notice their presence. He certainly didn’t acknowledge them.
When they did come into view, he had the look of 1940s American wrestler Gorgeous George: “Get your filthy hands off me!”
Durant’s effortless charisma, the too-cool-for-school aura, was a flashback to Curtly Ambrose, the towering and almost saintly West Indian quick who didn’t have to say a word to grab the attention. Ambrose and Durant: too good. The bastards.
Durant was unstoppable. Untouchable. Even for him. The best and most influential No.7 since Joey Johns was running around for Newcastle.
He finished with 29 points, six rebounds and three assists, and virtually won it on his own. They might have been flogged without him.
He raised one, and only one, eyebrow in the fourth quarter.
Otherwise, it was a stone-cold killer of a performance. A stone-cold thriller. He’s brilliant.
The remarkable thing about this Dream Team? It’s America’s B-Team. C-Team. D-Team.
Probably an F-Troop.
Imagine if Steph Curry was here, shooting threes like the robot that has been wheeled out to hit baskets from all over the floor as part of the pregame entertainment. (Robot never misses, by the way. Bloke’s a machine.)
Imagine if LeBron James had come to the Olympics, instead of going on a PR tour with Bugs Bunny for Space Jam II.
LeBron and Bugs end up playing a rogue team called Goon Squad in the movie.
You know what the Americans have fielded at the Olympics. Their Goon Squad, plus Durant.
And they’ve still won gold.