Chloe’s tips

1 Take it slowly – stabilising a stepfamily takes three to five years, sometimes more. That’s okay. Be kind to yourself.

2 Don’t get caught up with typical nuclear parent-type roles; being a friend and support for your new family members is a very good start.

3 Make your own rituals and traditions, spend time as a family and also acknowledge it’s important to let the original parent-child bond have time of its own.

4 Do your best to respect and nurture the bonds between the parent not living with you and their child. Ask for advice and support for how to make this work.

5 There are more than a million people in similar shoes – find some of them through family organisations, stepfamily and other web groups – there is great wisdom, kindness and humour out there!

“All three have got to feel I love them, that’s the goal.”