Fathers cop shaming too
A POLL HAS FOUND DADS COME IN FOR CRITICISM OVER THEIR PARENTING – PARTICULARLY IN HOW THEY DISCIPLINE THEIR CHILDREN – AND IT COMES FROM CLOSE TO HOME
ONE of the first things new mothers face is some sort of criticism.
Whether it’s a mother-inlaw pointing out you’re not dressing your newborn warmly enough, or a family friend saying “back in their day” babies used to sleep on their tummies.
Did you know fathers cop it too? In some ways, they deal with the same things as mothers, but in other ways, their experiences can be very different.
A national poll in the US has revealed interesting details about what fathers face when caring for their children.
According to the CS Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll on Children’s Health at the University of Michigan, about half of fathers say they have faced criticism and second-guessing about their parenting choices. The most common criticism they felt was in relation to how they disciplined their children, with two thirds listing it as the top category for negative comments.
The second top shaming category was diet and nutrition.
More than a quarter of fathers surveyed said such criticisms made them less confident as a parent, with about 20 per cent admitting such comments made them less inclined to be involved with the parenting of their children.
You may be surprised by this, but 44 per cent of time, the daddy-shaming comes from within the parental relationship. The next biggest offenders are grandparents at 24 per cent of the time and friends at 9 per cent.
To their credit, men who say they’ve fallen victim to father shaming take the information on board.
But that’s no reason to continue the shaming. Experts suggest others should be mindful of shaming.
“Family members should also be mindful of comments or critiques that may make fathers feel like they don’t know how to parent the ‘right’ way,” poll co-director Sarah Clark said.