Lockdown lessons
BEING COOPED UP AT HOME HAS BROUGHT UNEXPECTED POSITIVES, WRITES REBECCA BAKER
A LEADING national voice on parenting is calling on Australian families not to let positive changes adopted through COVID-19 fall away as life returns to normal.
Parenting and family author and expert Justin Coulson says he fears feelings of being timepoor and stressed will return as the busyness of life takes over.
He says the sentiment is being echoed by parents he speaks with across the nation. “Every family has had the opportunity over the past two-and-a-half months to learn new things about one another and what they value,” Dr Coulson, a father-of-six, says.
“The thing that I’m hearing most frequently from parents is the sense they’ve had of ‘slowing down and having time’.
“I think everyone is going to come away from this with learnings, and if we take those lessons and learn them properly, they will change the way we function as a family … we will grow from this experience.
“(If we don’t), people are going to miss what we have had and look back at this time with nostalgia. My message to parents is: slow it down, be a little more intentional.”
Dr Coulson says the key is identifying, as a family, the things people liked most during lockdown.
“Talk about what’s worked and do more of it. Find ways to make those things consistently a part of what you’re doing every day,” he says.
“The first thing I would be suggesting is to sit down with the kids and have them tell you what they enjoyed.
“The next step is coming up with strategies and solutions everyone can feel good about, so that you don’t lose those insights and opportunities.”
It might be simply resolving to regularly have dinner together as a family, setting a time once a week, fortnight or month to play board games or even continuing nightly walks together around the neighbourhood.
“I think it’s going to be a big cultural shock as people start to reboot but, hopefully, we make the kinds of decisions that will connect and bring our families together,” Dr Coulson says.
Adelaide registered psychologist and mum-of-three Amy Zadow agrees there have been welcome benefits to the forced family time.
“Certainly, there is a whole range of people, myself included, who have reported they have had wonderful experiences with their children during this time,” Dr Zadow says.
“For many, it’s been a really unique opportunity to spend time with teenage children who usually don’t want to spend a lot of time with their parents.”