Parents’ guide to growing up girls
SOCIAL media sites are turning girls as young as eight into teenagers with bad attitudes, poor body image and peer problems, a youth expert says.
Amanda Stokes, an author and mother-of-three, said “tweens” – kids aged between eight and 12 – were living a teenager’s life, but didn’t have the emotional maturity to cope.
Ms Stokes has written The Tween Mother’s Tool Book to help mums and dads raise their pre-teen girls.
“Tweens have got the moods and attitudes of teenagers and they’re going through puberty earlier,” she said.
“They’ve also got access to a lot of information through Instagram and TikTok, but don’t have the emotional intelligence to deal with it all.”
Ms Stokes said the trend for young girls to communicate through video games or social media messaging was causing problems.
“They don’t know how to read the tone or how to fix a situation that blows up with their friends,” she said.
“Girls on video games can gang up on each other and exclude one another – it’s not like having chats in the playground face-to-face.”
She also believes younger girls are developing a bad attitude and “walking all over their parents” at a younger age.
“They are nice at school but horrible at home – talking back and being rude to their parents, and parents often don’t have the time to deal with it,” Ms Stokes said.
In the book, which also tackles body image issues, Ms Stokes offers strategies for parents to improve communication, support positive friendships and deal with self-doubt.
Ms Stokes has raised her daughter Lily, 9, to be a good communicator and to come to her if she has any problems online.
Lily plays online games with friends such as Zaya Lindsay, 10, but she can only use social media apps on her mother’s phone under supervision.
“I can see what she’s looking at which is the important thing,” Ms Stokes said.
The book is for sale at raisingstrongdaughters.com.au.