FINDING YOUR PEACE OF MIND
UNDERSTANDING WHAT CAUSES THE CONFLICT WITHIN CAN START A JOURNEY OF SELF-AWARENESS
Mahatma Gandhi said, “Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it.” As the leader of the non-violent Indian Independence movement against British rule, his life – and subsequent assassination – have inspired civil rights and freedom movements across the world.
His statement is very true and in understanding that we tend to look out to the external world for the conflict, the causes and the paths to find resolution.
The evidence is everywhere to show man’s inhumanity to man and the efforts that organisations like Oxfam, Red Cross, Red Crescent, Medicins Sans Frontieres, UNOCHA (and many more) put in to alleviate those affected.
If we were to take that statement and apply it personally, we would necessarily explore the inner journey to conflict and what would become important then is to understand what creates the conflict within us in the first place in order to cope, find resolution, self-awareness, acceptance and with that, the essential nature of our personal peace.
Recently, Rowena and I were participants in a wonderful program called Heart-styles developed by Stephen and Dr Mara Klemich. We were introduced to the concept of the wounds and voids to the heart acquired through our daily lives as we develop into adults.
Briefly, these voids and wounds are the scars gathered through a lack or attack that is held to the heart like a Kevlar coating and contributes to shape our reactions and self-protection to events as we seek to fill the void, for example with self-promotion, money, drugs, status or retaliate, perhaps by using rejection, aggression, bullying, avoidance or our position to demonstrate our worth, which is mainly to ourselves.
For me, it makes sense that in order to find inner peace we need to go into the heart not just the mind. By having the courage to challenge our own behaviour we can break out of the Kevlar, heal the wounds and fill those voids with acceptance, tolerance and love for our self and for others.
Wikipedia defines inner peace (or peace of mind) as “a state of being mentally and spiritually at peace, with enough knowledge and understanding to keep oneself strong in the face of discord or stress’’.
Being “at peace’’ is considered by many to be healthy and the opposite of being stressed or anxious. When you stand in front of a mirror do you see the hate and the hurt or do you see the love and the light?
The journey to being real and at peace starts as soon as you stop looking out to justify what needs to change from within.
Nick Bennett is a facilitator, performance coach and partner of Minds Aligned: mindsaligned.com.au