HAVE A LAUGH

Good friend

Two friends were standing in a bank when a pair of robbers entered.

Not only did the thieves clean out the tills, but they walked around with bags and ordered everyone to throw their valuables in.

Just as the robbers got to the pair, one of the friends turned to the other and, passing him a bill, said, “By the way, Joe, here’s that twenty bucks I owe you.”

Golfers

A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers.

The engineer complained, “What’s with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!”

The doctor responded, “I don’t know but I’ve never seen such ineptitude!”

The priest noticed the greens keeper and hailed him over. “Hi George. Say George, what’s with that group ahead of us? They’re rather slow aren’t they?”

George answered, “Oh yes. That’s a group of blind fire fighters. They lost their sight while saving our clubhouse last year. So we let them play here any time free of charge.”

There was silence. Then the priest began, “That’s so sad. I’ll be sure to pray especially for them tonight.”

The doctor added, “Yep, good idea. And I’m going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there’s anything he can do for them.”

The engineer, ever the practical one, exclaimed, “Why can’t these blokes play at night?

Saving lives

A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him. “Why do we have to learn this stuff?” one young man blurted out.

“To save lives,” the professor responded.

A few minutes later the student spoke up again. “So how does physics save lives?”

The professor stared at the student for a long time without saying a word. Finally, the professor continued, “Physics saves lives because it keeps certain people out of medical school.”