Who Dares to ferment milk?

Stinky surprise after copping a spray

MYSTERY surrounds a smelly situation one lass get herself into this week, and she’s not sure being chosen for this honour is especially flattering.

Office operative wrote to colleagues: “Apologies to the owner of a two-month-old Dare coffee drink in the second fridge.

“I will never know why it chose me as I opened the fridge, deciding to spray its contents over myself and the first fridge.

“I must say, I am quite impressed by this unintentional booby trap.

“I tried to clean up best I could, hopefully the smell does not remain in the kitchen.”

Whispers was told the smell did indeed kick in ... three days later.

Just who the fermenter in this situation was remains a mystery.

STRANGER SUBURBS

IT WAS a strange week for a resident of South Toowoomba.

First there was the knock at the door early one morning, where a man in a rather excited state was discovered, pointing in the direction of the car parked out the front of the house and jabbering on about “a plant on the windscreen”.

Lo and behold, some enterprising night-walker had uprooted two plants from gardens unknown and draped them across the windscreen of the resident’s Toyota Camry.

Next afternoon, the same resident returned home to find two fluorescent light bulbs had been balanced atop the leaves of a succulent in the front yard.

What will they think of next?

WRONG B’DAY THEFT

INNER-CITY office worker had what can only be described as a bad Friday.

Not only was it the lass’ birthday, turning a youthful 55, but she fell victim to a heinous crime.

It seems the office thief, which had previously struck various colleagues in a steadily increasing crime wave of late, zeroed in on the once-presumed safe office space.

And there’s little hope of the stolen item’s return, leaving our lass to question why they stole the battery pack and couldn’t steal a few years from her age instead.

HOARDING HORROR

SUBURBAN lass is steadily coming to terms with the fact that her minimalistic lifestyle is not quite so.

Moving house recently, our girl packed up what she thought was the majority of her things - only to be ever so bluntly told by her soon-to-be housemate that indeed she was one diagnosis away from being a certified hoarder.

IRONIC BREACH

IF THERE was ever any doubt about the intense security systems at a certain data storage facility that opened this week, rest assured they’re on the money.

So much so that in order to take dignitaries through the centre for its official opening, overriding the system to allow ease of access through the myriad doors was far harder done than said.

Whispers, however, has it on good authority the afternoon tours went off without a hitch and the system restored back to its digital Fort Knox standards.

CAN’T TAKE A TRICK

BUSINESS executive was looking forward to catching up with a few mates at a recent conference at the coast.

The organiser, however, had other ideas and slotted him into the share apartment with his boss.

Very quiet nights had by all.