‘Ear you’re goin’ to get new ‘ip, Pete
AS MY London brother might say, “I ‘ear you’re goin’ to get a new ‘ip Pete”.
Yes, he’s right; I’m goin’ to get a new ‘ip...as soon as I pluck up the courage to do what my latest doctor recommends!
Apparently me righ’ ‘ip’s stuffed and it’s the reason why I’ve been struggling to walk unsupported in recent weeks. “It’s obvious,” he told me, with hardly a glance at the impressive Xrays I had placed before him last week. Apparently I’ve got significant boneon-bone interaction.
This is what is causing much of the pain I am presently experiencing whenever I get out of my chair to switch the tele on. Silly old me! I had just put it down to the quality of the programs that I had chosen to watch. All I have to do now is to convince myself that chopping away a fair bit of my body is a sensible idea, and the replacement hardware will be basically pain-free and raring to go.
I’ll report back on that in a few weeks/months time. Meanwhile I am pretty sure Spurs will have to struggle through the rest of the summer without me.
Hips are funny things. They make it possible for you to sit reasonably comfortably on the toilet as well as giving you something to hang your trousers on when it’s time to move on.
They basically hold your legs together while still providing space for your genitals and your botty. They provide the manly thrust for front row forwards at games.
You can shoot from the hip when asked to give an opinion, or shout “Hip, Hip Hooray” when your team scores. Hip is a slang word for fashionably current, and in the know. Wikipedia says that to be hip is to have “an attitude, a stance in opposition to the “unfree world, or to what is square, or prude ..... ”
‘‘ I KNOW IT WOULD BE HYPOCRITICAL TO SAY I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING IT ALL SORTED OUT BUT I SUPPOSE IT WILL HAVE TO BE DONE DESPITE MY OWN HYPERSENSITIVITY TO ALL THAT MEDICAL STUFF.
Hip, like cool, does not refer to one specific quality. I know it would be hypocritical to say I’m looking forward to getting it all sorted out but I suppose it will have to be done despite my own hypersensitivity to all that medical stuff.
That’s enough of this kind of rubbish for one week!
I was playing the faithful partner at a Toowoomba Hospice function last Saturday as part of National Volunteers Week. It was a most enjoyable gathering of people who are often the life-blood of our community. Without their commitment we would not be able to provide the necessary care for clients and their families as they battle with the often final days of their lives.
The hospice is a brilliant, very caring place where those in need are provided with love in abundance as well as the nitty-gritty of their daily needs.
Such places depend on the joint efforts of nursing professionals and dedicated volunteers. Their cooperation, together with the administrative and governance skills brought to the table by a diversely experienced Board of Management are what ensure that last days and the often inevitability of death are managed with genuine concern and understanding. The place oozes with genuine care. It ain’t always easy either for those struggling bravely or those left behind after the often inevitable death.
It’s rare that I front up at a function merely as a partner to my wife. It’s good, especially when some guests identify me as that bloke who writes in The Chronicle each week. I’d like a quid for every time I’m asked how I think of topics to write about. I thank them and tell them the truth ...... I don’t know how; but I love doing it!