Toowoomba duo lost cause

Are all men hopeless with directions?

GROUP of middle-aged Toowoomba men had for some time planned a weekend trip to Yarraman to stay at a mate’s pub.

Three of the crew decided to travel up together and, because it had been some time since any of them had been north to Yarraman, they had resorted to Google maps in order to plot their route.

However, they hadn’t even left Newtown and they were lost.

While picking up the third member of the group at his residence on Bridge St, the driver had inadvertently turned up a wrong street.

“What are you driving up here for, this is a dead-end?” his passenger said.

“Oh, that’s right”, driver replied with more than a little embarrassment.

“Geez, we’re not even out of Toowoomba yet and we’re lost already,” the passenger continued.

CAUSING A STINK

SAME passenger caused something of a stink on the home-ward trip last Sunday morning.

He had the driver pull into a service station in Cooyar because he needed to use the “facilities”.

He politely asked the service station attendant for directions to the “Men’s” and was told “around the back”.

However, as some might say like most men our man is not one to listen properly to directions and failed to hear the attendant say that he couldn’t use the facilities as they had no power - hence no water.

This our man ultimately discovered after he had used the facilities when he noticed not a single flush of water emanated.

He sheepishly asked the attendant if he could have a bucket of water only to be told that there was no water at all and wouldn’t be until the power came back on at about 2pm.

The trio then continued on their journey but the incident did little for Toowoomba-Cooyar relations.

GHOSTLY ECHO

JOURNALST of a particular Toowoomba newspaper resides in a house split into four one bedroom units.

He thought he was going crazy Monday night when he heard echoes of Media Watch’s Paul Barry floating through the air.

The journo was watching the program when he heard the same sentence slightly delayed from behind him.

“What is happening?” he thought. “Am I going crazy?”

It turned out three of the four units were watching the same program at the time, hence the echo.

Thankfully the journalist isn’t that crazy... yet.

TWO WEEK SACRIFICE

TWO North Toowoomba house mates decided it was time for some detoxing and set about leading a healthy lifestyle for a couple of weeks.

The two lasses did without pretty much all junk foods over the fortnight, sticking to fruit and vegetables and all things healthy.

As an incentive, the two very competitive ladies even had a sin jar into which had to be placed a “fiver” each time one of the participants fell from grace and indulged in so much as a coffee or a beer.

After the two weeks was up, the duo had enough in the sin jar to cater for a celebratory feast.

They ended the fast in spectacular fashion, smashing a pizza, calzone, beers, popcorn and chocolate after a fortnight of tofu, sprouts and fresh air.

CARING MATES

GROUP of mates are so competitive they hate losing at anything to each other.

The crew usually meet each Thursday night for a few afterwork drinks, a catchup and “friendly” game or two of table tennis.

On Thursday night one of their number sent a text that he was crook and wouldn’t be in attendance.

A text came back: “Sorry to hear that mate. I won the table tennis”.