HAVE A LAUGH

STUMPED

MY FAMILY was playing a trivia board game one night.

When it was my brother-in-law’s turn, he rolled the dice and landed on “Science & Nature.”

His question was, “If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?”

He thought for a moment and then asked, “Is it on or off?”

CARRY ON

ONE month into Marine Corps training in San Diego, California, we were preparing for a ten-mile march in 100-degree weather when a jeep drove up with a large radio in the back.

“Who knows anything about radios?” our drill instructor asked.

Several hands went up, and anticipating a ride in the jeep, recruits began listing their credentials. Everything from a degree in communications to a part-time job in a repair shop was declared.

The DI listened to all then pointed to the most qualified. “You!” he barked. “Carry the radio.”

SHIPS AHOY

THIS sailor fell off the crows nest on a sailing ship and fell trough the first deck and the second deck of the ship.

The captain went up to the sailor and asked if he was ok.

“I am all right,” said the sailor. “I have been through hardships before.”

EYE SEE

THE guy sat next to me on the train pulled out a photo of his wife and said, “She’s beautiful, isn’t she?”

I said, “If you think she’s beautiful, you should see my girlfriend mate!”

He said, “Why? Is she a stunner?”

I said, “No, she’s an optician!”

MULTI-TASKER

I AM great at multi-tasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.