HAVE A LAUGH

TRAVEL TIME

AN HOUR into the flight from Sydney to Perth, an announcement came over the aeroplane’s speaker system.

“Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. There is no need for panic, but one of our engines has failed. I repeat: there is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take 45 minutes longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left.”

Thirty minutes later the captain announced, “Another engine has failed and we need to modify our flight plan. The trip will take an additional two hours. But don’t worry ... we can fly just fine on two engines.”

An hour later the captain announced, “Ummm, one more engine has failed and our arrival will now be delayed by three hours. But please don’t worry ... we still have one engine left.”

A young blonde passenger turned to her travelling companion in the next seat and remarked, “If we lose one more engine, we’ll be up here all day!”

SCANNED IN

WHY does the Norway Navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can SCANDINAVIAN.

BANK ROBBERS

TWO accountants go to their credit union on their lunch break, when armed robbers burst in.

While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line-up the customers, including the accountants, up against a wall and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables.

While this is going on accountant number one jams something in accountant number two’s hand. Without looking down, accountant number two whispers, “What is this?”

Number one replies, “It’s that $50 I owe you.”