HAVE A LAUGH
THE PROPOSAL
AN IRISHMAN proposed to his girlfriend on Saint Patrick’s Day and gave her a ring with a synthetic diamond.
On learning it wasn’t real she protested vehemently about his cheapness.
He explained that in honor of Saint Patrick’s Day, he picked her a sham-rock.
HARD QUESTIONS
PREPARING my son for his first day of kindergarten, we were reviewing numbers and counting. Suddenly he asked, “What is the biggest number in the world?”
As briefly as possible, I tried to explain the concept of infinity. I thought I had done pretty well, but then he said, “Dad, what number comes just before infinity?”
TYPICAL HR
“I PROPOSED to my girlfriend last night, who just got promoted to a HR position earlier in the day.”
“That is cool! What did she say?”
She said, “We will get back to you soon.”
DRINK CHOICE
Q: What is a soprano’s favorite drink growing up?
A: High-C!
LITERAL INTERPRETATION
A BLONDE was on board a small two seater plane when suddenly the pilot clutched his chest and died.
Not knowing how to fly a plane she grabbed the radio.
“Mayday, mayday! My pilot just died!”
Ground control received her call for help and answered back: “Don’t worry, madam. I’ll talk you down, just do as I say. First I need you to give me your height and position.”
“I’m 158cm and sitting in the front.”