The Chronicle

More BS at your ABC

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WHISPERS understand­s several councillor­s were ropeable that a certain Toowoomba ABC radio presenter was able to get a parking fine waived recently.

One councillor made the point that they had been ticketed while at a community event in a council-branded car.

And she happily paid the fine.

Special deals always get up the noses of the majority of residents who are excluded from them.

FUEL FOR THOUGHT

CERTAIN owner of restaurant­s about town wanted to show staff that he still maintained the common touch despite being the boss.

He volunteere­d to take one of the company vans to the service station and have it refuelled.

Unfortunat­ely, by putting unleaded petrol into a diesel powered engine the humbling exercise ended up being an expensive one.

BANNER FOUND

AS reported in The Chronicle last month, the Vietnam Veterans banner had gone missing from the RSL in Ruthven St.

Enter, Bob Matthews and Ian Haycock, a couple of eagle eyed veterans who last week came across the banner which had been left in one of the bins of a Toowoomba charity.

“Bob was fortunatel­y present when the banner was found and was able to relate it to The Chronicle article and identify its owner,” Vietnam veteran Norman Fry told Whispers.

“The Vietnam Veterans, Darling Downs is most grateful to have the banner returned and expresses its thanks to Bob, Ian and the charity.”

WHAT’S IN A NAME?

TOOWOOMBA woman had been shopping online for Christmas gifts and had been searching for calendars depicting cute ducks.

The particular book business emailed back a response: “We couldn’t find any matches for ‘duck calendar’ did you mean ‘ **** calendar’?”

Our lass is now searching online for calendars depicting cute puppies.

GOOD NEWS

REPORTER and photograph­er of a certain Toowoombab­ased newspaper were responding to a residentia­l fire during the week and set off in marked company car.

As they were about to enter Hume St near the Hooper Centre, a chap who had obviously enjoyed a long, long night of celebratio­n staggered over to the car, motioning for the reporter to wind the window down. Expecting a blast of abuse from the staggering pedestrian, the reporter and photograph­er steeled themselves.

However, as the chap moved closer to the car he simply slurred: “You haven’t got a spare Chronicle in there have ya?”

BOBBING FOR COINS

PLUMBERS had worked all day on an obstructio­n in the men’s urinal of an inner-city pub to no avail.

Telling the publican that they would have to come back the next day to finish the job, the tradies retired for the day.

However, the obstructio­n was leaving a watery mess on the floor, prompting two patrons at the bar to try their hand at fix it.

Some 15 minutes later, the pair emerged from the men’s toilet having fixed the problem — a 20c piece stuck in the piping.

While proud of themselves for their impromptu plumbing skills, the 20c was not about to be received as acceptable tender by staff when they placed it on the bar.

LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON

KEARNEYS Spring dad can’t complain that his young son doesn’t follow in his footsteps.

Dad was out in the shed tinkering with some men’s business when his three-year-old son walked in with two cans of beer which he had retrieved from the fridge.

“One’s for you and one’s for me, Dad!” the little bloke declared.

While chuffed that his firstborn had wanted to sit and chew the fat over a beer with him, Dad explained that the little bloke was far too young to be having a beer.

This didn’t go over well with the three-year-old who may well have needed a beer to calm him down.

 ??  ?? WELCOME HOME: Taking back possession of the Vietnam Vets banner are (from left) Ian Haycock, Norman Fry and Bob Mathews.
WELCOME HOME: Taking back possession of the Vietnam Vets banner are (from left) Ian Haycock, Norman Fry and Bob Mathews.

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