HAVE A LAUGH

LIFE SUPPORT

AFTER the birth of their first child, Tom and Sarah decided it was time to write a will and get their affairs in order.

They went to a lawyer and outlined for him their ideas about how their estate should be handled.

The lawyer then asked them questions about what medical means should be employed should they become severely injured.

Tom spoke up.

“I don’t want my life regulated by some machine,” he said.

“I just can’t stand the idea of receiving my nourishment from a bottle.”

Sarah took Tom’s words to heart.

When they got home, she cut the TV cord and dumped out all of Tom’s beer.

BIRDS AND BEES

One day, little Johnny came up to his father and asked, “Dad, where did I come from?”

Dad squirmed a bit, but thought it was time his son knew the facts of life.

He told him the expression of love resulted in the beginning of life.

How life developed and finally, how a child was born.

As the story unfolded, Johnny’s eyes got wider and wider.

When his father was finished, Johnny said, “Wow, that is really neat. That sure beats what Billy told me. He said that he came from Brisbane.”

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY

When she got flowers from her husband on Valentine’s Day, my daughter quickly opened the card. All it said was, “No.” What did that mean?

She called her husband and asked him.

“I didn’t attach any message, The florist asked if I had a message and I said, ‘No’.”