Repossess my phone and put me out of my misery
IN an earlier story, I noted Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone in the 19th century.
It is reported US President Rutherford B Hayes said, on viewing the contraption for the first time, “That’s an amazing invention, but who would ever want to use one of them?”
I reckon the good President was wrong because a disproportionate number of people want to use them today for unsolicited calls and for me that can be as many as 10 of the damned intrusions a day.
After Mr Bell invented the “unwanted” device, the technology remained very much unchanged.
Big clunky things, with both ear and mouth pieces, frozen in time for about a century.
The first mobile telephones of the 1980s could also double as house bricks.
And now we answer incoming calls from a wristwatch. What the heck!
Now I am, seriously, a big Telstra fan, as I was a big Postmaster-General (PMG) fan and after that a big Telecom fan.
But despite my loyalty, Telstra wouldn’t let me say farewell to my home phone and rely solely on my mobile phone.
Instead Telstra told me to buy a “bundle” which included internet access and home telephone.
You’ve got to love all these brand new techno words. Bundle, fair dinkum, it sounds like a new born baby in a fluffy pink blanket.
I’ve got those unsolicited callers covered on my mobile phone.
As soon as the initial call is identified as someone wanting to sell me wine, solar panels, life insurance etc or seeking donations, I log the number as “Unsolicited call wine” etc. so when they next call they will not get a response.
But those unsolicited calls to home require a different strategy.
The usual courteous message of, “Thanks for calling Greg Johnson, I am sorry I can’t take your call right now, please leave your message and I’ll call you back as soon as I can,” was replaced with, “Thanks for calling Greg Johnson, I am sorry I can’t take your call right now, I know you want to speak to me as much as I want to speak to you so please do leave a message and I’ll call you back as soon as I can.”
And you know what difference the change to new message made? Absolutely none.
Instead I get this automated message, “You have one message, telephone number xx xxxx xxxx reached your telephone and did not leave a message.”
For the life of me, that is not a message.
In a two-day test period I received 12 unsolicited calls from NSW, three from Victoria, two from Queensland and two from South Australia. Total 18 calls, all with that stupid message, “You have one message, blah blah blah, did not leave message.”
Please my good friends at Telstra, put me out of my misery and come and repossess my home phone!