Support vital for new mums
Real mums are in fashion on social media with the trend being to demonstrate the realities of new parenting. Women are speaking out about the challenges of newborn life and the impact of baby on their lives like never before.
This honest analysis is important, being a mum is hard, especially for the first time, but it is also important to consider what part our expectations, our preparations and our actions have on this adjustment and to, in particular, make sure you have a range of different options available to support this transitional time.
The first thing to consider is the birth. OK, we cannot plan all aspects of birth and of course, some of the best laid plans can go astray but it is also important not to completely ignore the evidence and the potential things you can plan for.
The first thing is whether you would like a physiological birth or some other type of vaginal birth or whether you are preparing for a caesarean section. When considering this, think about what happens in the weeks after birth. The decision to have a caesarean section as a planned alternative also needs to factor in recovery time – you will have major surgery – and recovering from surgery along with caring for a new baby will require additional support at home.
Support at home, particularly after a surgical birth such as a caesarean, is best from people who you are really comfortable with – your partner, your own mum, sometimes sisters, mother-in-law or even very close friends.
Liz Wilkes, managing director of My Midwives, recommends that partners in particular have a bare minimum of two weeks and preferably four weeks off work.
“Women need a lot of rest and recovery time. Partners are best placed usually to provide this, after all, mostly, it is their baby too,” she says.
“Around the two-week mark is when the maximum tiredness usually hits so if it is possible to have longer off work, then that is the best option. Where that can’t happen having a trusted “other” to fill the space is really important.”
Other considerations around this period and beyond include how well baby is feeding sleeping and settling.
“Education about what to do, what is normal and what steps can be taken when things take a detour is the best strategy to reduce anxiety.” Liz adds.
“The addition of online education programs, such as our online education modules and virtual classes, enable women from a variety of geographical locations to gain a deeper understanding of newborn behavior, how to respond and what to do if mum or bub are not doing well. Mum’s need specific support if they are not coping and it is super important that they have a range of strategies to get that support.”
Ms Wilkes suggests all mums develop, before birth, a list of options around where they can get support.
“In the immediate period you may have lots of helpers, family, a home visiting midwife, perhaps you are referred to child health services.
“But it is important to consider ‘what next’ if that does not work. Do you have a mental health specialist? Have you reviewed who you could link in with if things are challenging? Do you know what services are available in your local area?
“Often a good GP is a great place to start, but if you have a local midwifery service such as My Midwives, they may also be able to point you in the right direction. Having postnatal education classes or midwifery care in the first six weeks may also set you up well for a great start to parenting”. For further information email admin@mymidwives.com.au or phone 07 4642 2977 to book an initial consultation with My Midwives. You can also access online education classes at classes.mymidwives.com.au
Women need a lot of rest and recovery time. Partners are best placed usually to provide this, after all, mostly, it is their baby too