Storms still rage but it’s a calmer Kyrgios
NICK IN A HAPPY PLACE
EVEN Nick Kyrgios thought this day might never come.
For all his bragging about how great he thinks he is, noone has doubted Kyrgios more than himself.
No-one has ever questioned his talent, because he’s always had an abundance of that.
What’s really held Kyrgios back for so long are the demons inside his mind.
Not any more.
He might be full of rage when he’s on the court but he’s never been calmer in his life and it’s bringing him unprecedented success.
In the first moments after he sealed his place in the Wimbledon semi-finals with an emphatic straight sets win over Cristian Garin, there were no wild celebrations.
Instead, he simply sat down on his chair, quietly reflecting on what he’d just achieved after becoming the first Australian man in 17 years to reach the Wimbledon semis.
“I never thought that I would be here. The ship, I thought, was gone Especially where I was a couple years ago,” he said. “There was a point where I was almost done with the sport. Obviously I posted this year about the kind of mental state I was in in 2019 when I was at the Australian Open with self-harm and suicidal thoughts and stuff.
“If you asked anyone if I was able to do that the last couple years, I think everyone would have probably said, ‘no, he doesn’t have the mental capacity, he doesn’t have the fitness capacity, he doesn’t have the discipline,’ all that.
“I almost started doubting myself with all that traffic coming in and out of my mind.
To make the final, Kyrgois will have to beat Rafa Nadal, the all-time grand slam leader. If he wins that, he’ll probably have to play Novak Djokovic.
Kyrgios will remain a divisive figure because of his crude oncourt behaviour, insulting anyone he likes without ever taking any responsibility.
By his own admission, he’s also been a wasted talent, a player with such rare gifts that he could have been anything.
Yet, until this week, his biggest achievement in a decade of playing grand slams was a solitary quarter-final place at Wimbledon in 2014. He’s been labelled a choker and a quitter but he gave a rare and deeply personal insight into what he’s been dealing with in private when he opened up about his battles with depression earlier this year.
He revealed not only had he felt lonely and depressed but he had been abusing alcohol and drugs and experienced suicidal thoughts, leading him to self-harming.
“I obviously had thoughts the last year and a half, whether I wanted to play anymore. Lost the love, lost the fire, lost the spark,” he said.
“Then some things just changed in my life. I don’t know. I kind of just rediscovered that I’ve got a lot of people that want me to play, that I play for. I’ve got a lot left in the tank. I feel like I’m probably playing some of my best tennis, mentally feeling great.
“It’s been a heck of a ride. “I think everyone has the same goal in my team. That’s why it’s working. I made it pretty known to them that I wanted to go pretty deep here and possibly even raise the trophy.”