“Women all want pretty much the same things”

‘Oh woman, woman! Thou art a mystery!” So wrote the wonderfully named Amantine Lucile Aurore Dupin, better known as the French novelist George Sand, in 1837.

That was back in the day when females had to adopt male names if they had any chance of publishing success – or doing anything other than intermittently fainting – so Amantine became George and promptly began writing novel after novel of subversive female rebellion.

For example, this quote is from her 1837 book Mauprat, which is basically the 19th-century French precursor to the Me Too movement, and is well worth a revisit (if you are into 19th-century French feminist literature, and who isn’t?).

What I’m revisiting today, however, is that quote, because while I love Dupin (not least because she strode around Paris in trousers when women were not supposed to wear them, in case they felt comfortable) I don’t think women are so mysterious at all, at least not the ones I know.

We all want pretty much the same things – respect, pay equity, to be safe, a level playing field at work, for our families and friends to be happy, and a damn good book.

Anyhow, after consulting some friends, I have come up with a list of things we believe most, if not all, women share, say, do, or believe.

● When emptying the car boot’s grocery bags, we would rather die than make a second trip. Instead we will carry 17 in each hand, tuck a couple under our arms, and put our keys in our teeth.

● Every now and again, women, for reasons not yet quite understood, will decide they need a fringe, and get one. They will do this even though they damn well remember what happened last time.

● It does not matter how old we are, we will always refer to our old school friends as “the girls”.

● When getting ready for a night out, tearing our wardrobe apart, trying on several outfits, and almost choosing something else, nine times out of 10 we will settle for a pair of jeans and a nice top.

● There are very few women who will not feel better about themselves, and the world, after going for a walk with a friend. Or by ourselves. The secret is the movement. And the breathing. And the outside.

● Some women are not excellent at confrontation and will do pretty much

anything to avoid it, though many of us are getting much better at this. The exception to this rule is if a person hurts someone we love, or who is vulnerable, then we will go full She-Ra on your arse. My friend Jeannie, for example, once said to two teenagers who were harassing a puppy, “I will cut you”.

● If we go out to dinner and you are rude to the waiter, you will never see us again – after we’ve finished our sticky date pudding.

● During many women’s lives, we will consider fad dieting, anti-ageing creams, Botox, fillers, shapewear, anti-cellulite treatment, tummy tucks, eye lifts, intermittent fasting and various other methods to change or improve our appearance, all of which is, of course, our choice. But there will come a day, one glorious, shining day, when we will realise we are enough just as we are. frances.whiting@news.com.au