OFF THE RECORD
THERE’S cheap and then there is this. The scene is a buck’s party in the best man’s unit. Everything is laid on with food and drink for all and of course the usual lads’ mag entertainment in the shapely form of a stripper. The agreement among the boys was that the cost of everything would be split between them to give the groom-to-be a night of memories designed to keep him warm during the many years of wedded bliss. All goes well, the stripper gets buck naked (as well as herself) and the next day it is time for every man to pay up. Except for one. “I passed out and so didn’t get to see that girl so I’m not paying my share of her expenses,” said he. A big argument, he refused to budge and so he has been marked as NTPA – Never to Party Again.
IT started out with such promise – a new board came in to help get this good community organisation ship back on course. Naturally the ousted lot are harbouring a fair bit of resentment about being removed but patiently bide their time by undermining and sniping at the fresh crew. After six months of infighting the mutiny was in full swing and the whole situation became so untenable that the new board resigned en masse leaving the decks clear for the oldies to move back in their exited positions. The moral? As Julius Caesar discovered - beware of committees, they’ll get you in the back every time.
IF you are starting off a new venture, it is always handy to remember the old adage about attracting more flies with honey than vinegar. How then to understand the attitude of one who must be obeyed who has managed to offend almost everyone in the setting up of this business? Suppliers, potential customers, and old friends were all subjected to a foul mouthed tirade about their ineptitude and unsuitability to be seen anywhere near this enterprise. How long before the doors close due to – wait for it – lack of customers. Gee, do you think it could have been something that was said?
OF all the reasons for a relationship breakup this has to be the weirdest we’ve ever heard. He, who has obviously spent far too long looking in the mirror, has told this damsel that he didn’t like the way she looked. Nothing to do with her facial features but somewhere in a direct line down from her chin and halfway to her toes. Huh? Yep, it seems this dude has a clear definition of what’s right for his sight and she simply didn’t pass muster.