OFF THE RECORD

HANDS up those who know the golden rule? No, not that Kumbaya nonsense of doing unto others. The more relevant is the real life version that goes like this – Whoever has the gold makes the rules. Such is the case for this recently divorced dame who has ended up with a sizeable sum with which to do as she pleases. So her pleasure is to head off on a luxury, no expense spared trip to America and beyond, taking along as her walk-on luggage a male travelling companion. He is charming and funny but has a flaw - a severe shortage of walking around town money. Perfect for her and he gets to tour the world in a manner to which he has now become very accustomed. His only duties are to ensure that whatever madam wants, madam gets. Easy.

WE are all for people with a get up and have a go attitude. So technically we are proud that this chap has launched a new business venture which is designed to ‘help people find their real purpose in life’. The only problem is that will the advice be worthwhile considering he has failed spectacularly at every venture he has ever attempted. How big were the failures? Let’s just say that the Hindenburg disaster at least had survivors whereas his multiple attempts have gone down with everyone involved feeling the pain. Another brilliant example of do as I say, not as I have done.

WHAT’S in a name? An awful lot if you imagine you are one of the leading lights of the city. Part of our job is to take socials and then ask for the names to go with the pictures. Fairly straightforward until it came to this person with the exalted self-opinion. When asked the answer was, “You know me!’ Um, no with a polite explanation that we see a lot of different people every week. That didn’t wash because when you are this important it should be compulsory knowledge to know THIS name. Finally the moniker was given but with a tag. “Make sure you remember it for next time.” There is a very, very good chance, if we can remember the face, that there won’t be a next time.