MERCHANDISING SCOPE ENDLESS

MERCHANDISE. It’s a word that instantly makes you ask “how much?” (usually followed by a raised eyebrow and bruised vendor ego). But in this case the Queensland Rugby League appears to be headed in the right direction. Atherton Roosters have been selected as one of only 12 regional clubs which will take part in the XXXX State of Origin Collectable Can/Crown campaign. Each club will have their own can, which, when all together, spells out the word QUEENSLANDER. Keeping up? Neither are we, but we reckon the Far North could cash in on other merchandise. KNEE-GRAZER KEYRINGS Ever played sport in the Far North? Chances are your pins have come in contact with sharp objects not supposed to be on a sporting field. For just $19.95, you can now buy your own “sharp bloody thing” that loves grazing the buggery out of your knees. YOBBO IN A CAN You haven’t played footy without being on the end of ye old spray from ye even older drunkard on the hill. Much like an old car horn makes that “ahooga” noise, our version simply spits out “you’re no good, No. 18!”. FAKE TEETH While age may have got the better of your gran’s chompers, a lot of footy players have lost one or two from the odd arrant elbow. Our fake teeth, to ensure it looks realistic, come with your two front chompers missing. EAR PLUGS The worst thing about grassroots sport is hearing every abusive word levelled at referees. It’s also the best bit, FYI. But for just $499 Inside pass is selling the Far North’s own ear plugs, which come complete with a book of popular swear words.