Children need tough love
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Dr Michael Carr-Gregg (above) says parents need to stop overpraising their kids or risk turning them into spoiled little narcissists.
STOP overpraising your kids, you are turning them into spoiled little narcissists who won’t cope with real life, child psychologists warn.
Dr Michael Carr-Gregg says the trend of “wussifying” children has reached absurd levels.
“How bad do things need to get before we realise that we are creating a wave of little princes and princesses who know no boundaries and never hear the word “no”? We see their tantrums in restaurants, airports and shops and they are often pacified with an ipad or a phone game,” Dr CarrGregg said.
The Australian expert backs research from Harvard University that narcissism is cultivated at an early age and parents should hold back on empty praise when a child carries out “real responsibilities”, and reserve the accolades for random acts of kindness.
The Ivy League psychologists found a recipe for creating narcissism and entitled children is when parents over-inflate their egos and tell them they are better than everyone.
“There is a crisis of confidence in parents. It is not helping a child prepare for life by doing things for them that they can do for themselves. They don’t need a reward if they simply carry out these tasks. Research shows a huge decline in the mental health and wellbeing of teenagers. It is important to put life skills into action when they are young. It is difficult for a self-entitled child to interact with society,” Dr CarrGregg said.
In the Mission Australia Youth Survey for 2016, young people nominate coping with stress, school or study problems and body image as their top three issues of concern.
Mum Kendall Seddon says her three-year-old Nevaeh loves to pretend she is a princess but, in real life, is being raised in a grounded fashion.
“I agree with the psychologists in this. I make sure I allow the time to teach my children that you have to work for what you have and it is important to pitch in and not feel entitled.
“Nevaeh helps out with my home business and I try to be a hard-working role model.
“She has boundaries and her manners are impeccable,” Ms Seddon said.