you talkin’ to me?

Film quotes pose as ques­tions. Film stars try to cope.

Total Film - - Teaser - In the crosshairs this month: EWEN BREM­NER

You talkin’ to me?

I am talk­ing to you, and only you. I’m in my apart­ment in Ed­in­burgh and I’m look­ing over the hills, over the ocean, to Fife.

Do you feel lucky, punk?

I feel very lucky, punk. Yeah, I feel very for­tu­nate to be part of the ex­tra­or­di­nary phe­nom­e­non that Trainspotting has proven it­self to be. It’s opened many doors for me in the world that I want to work in, so I feel very lucky, punk. I feel lucky to be a punk.

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moon­light?

I al­ways dance with the devil in the pale moon­light. Ev­ery day. I like to dance close to the edge. That’s some­thing that de­fines my work. I need to feel that sense of dan­ger; I need to know where the edge is, and that I’m in dan­ger of go­ing over the edge. Then I feel happy about my work. If I feel too safe, if I feel some­thing’s too straight­for­ward or too com­fort­able or with­out risk, then I feel I’m in the wrong place. I need to feel I could fall over the edge.

You talk the talk; do you walk the walk?

I as­pire to walk the walk that I talk. I al­ways as­pire to do that. That’s im­por­tant for me.

What’s the last thing that you do re­mem­ber?

In life? Putting down the toi­let seat? I re­cently fin­ished this thing for TNT called Will, which is about young Wil­liam Shakespeare. I’m play­ing the evilest man in Eng­land, do­ing the most dis­gust­ing, de­spi­ca­ble things to al­most ev­ery char­ac­ter I come across. So I’ve been tor­tur­ing peo­ple mer­ci­lessly, and turn­ing tor­ture into an art form.

Why so se­ri­ous?

I al­ways take com­edy very se­ri­ously. I think as an ac­tor, when I go to Amer­ica, I get ap­proached by peo­ple who say, “Oh, you’re that co­me­dian!” I can­not tell a joke to save my life.

If I tell a joke, it’s go­ing to be a dis­as­ter. There’s no way I could get to the end of a joke re­mem­ber­ing all the im­por­tant el­e­ments that are go­ing to pay off in the punch­line. So I am, in no way, a co­me­dian.

What’s your favourite scary movie?

I’d say it’s prob­a­bly Funny Games by Michael Haneke. He also did an­other film called Time Of The Wolf, which is a great scary movie as well. I like it be­cause it’s very be­liev­able. They’re both very be­liev­able films about the world that we know tum­bling down around us, and you’re sud­denly star­ing into the abyss, into the void.

If you could change some­thing in your life, any­thing at all, what would it be?

I would be­come a tidy, or­gan­ised, ef­fi­cient, non-pro­cras­ti­nat­ing paragon of ex­cel­lence. That’s my num­ber one mis­sion. Ac­tu­ally, I’m go­ing to make it my num­ber two mis­sion, be­cause it sounds like too much work, and I love to pro­cras­ti­nate.

Do you like what you do for a liv­ing, th­ese things that you see?

Yeah, I love it. I think it’s im­por­tant, what­ever work you’re en­gaged in, I think it’s im­por­tant to try to find a way to en­joy it. And that might not be very easy, but it’s the eas­i­est thing in the world to com­plain or to moan. Ac­tors are the worst for that.

What would you do if you knew you had less than one minute to live?

Take a deep breath. I’d take a deep breath and… yeah, try to keep calm. Look out over Fife, maybe.

Well, what did you think I would do with them? I’m a fuck­ing junkie.

Ah. It’s a rhetor­i­cal ques­tion. Do­ing T2, I was pleased Spud had as much fight in him as he did, be­cause in the Porno novel that Irvine had writ­ten, Spud was like an aca­demic in out­sider artist terms, writ­ing a his­tory of Leith. It’s a hard thing to sell to an au­di­ence, that here you have some­one who is writ­ing a story which is his­tory. Mem­ory be­comes fic­tion, which be­comes his­tory, which then be­comes the orig­i­nal Trainspotting movie, which is based on a novel, which then be­comes the orig­i­nal book. It’s like a snake eat­ing its tail. JF

ETA | OUT 5 june / T2 Trainspot ing is out on DVD and Blu-ray this month. read our rev iew on page 100.

‘I need to kn ow where the ed ge is , that I’m in dan ger of goin g over the ed ge’

JACKET SPUD Ewen Brem­ner heads for the hills in T2 Trainspotting.

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