In a new regular, our boxoffice-bomb squad revisits the sunken wreck that is Cutthroat Island.

Sea, salty Dawgs and stinky sewage: our new regular examines how Renny Harlin’s adventure launched a thousand ‘sunk’ headlines…

Why it was a good idea (on paper)

After his success with Cliffhanger, Renny Harlin aimed to revitalise the spirit of classic high-seas blockbusters with modern eventmovie gusto. With Geena Davis and Michael Douglas (stirring nostalgia for Romancing The Stone) upfront, Harlin promised a spectacle to leave audiences “gasping in awe”, anchored in old-school charm.

What went wrong?

When the script emphasised Davis’ (then Harlin’s wife) role over his, Douglas jumped ship. Frantic recasting brought action-adventure neophyte Matthew Modine onboard, joining a female lead who was loath to ‘carry’ the film without Douglas. The crisis delayed Harlin’s arrival on-set in Malta, whereupon he demanded the costly sets be rebuilt. A rushed (and wooden) script, illness and sewage in the water tanks compounded the chaos. And swiftly sacked co-star Oliver Reed’s grog-fuelled self-exposure at a party didn’t help.

Redeeming feature

John Debney’s retro-swish score and Vic Armstrong’s stunt work impressed, while some critics praised Cutthroat’s inversion of trad gender roles. But Frank Langella ruled the seas, hitting the right camp notes as (“bad”) Dawg Brown.

What happened next?

Pulled from cinemas only three weeks after its December 1995 release, Cutthroat was blamed for scuttling struggling Terminator 2 production company Carolco. The Guinness Book Of World Records

anointed it the biggest box-office flop ever. When Harlin/Davis actioner The Long Kiss Goodnight also under-performed, Davis turned to Stuart Little and embraced archery. Harlin returned to the water with 1999’s Deep Blue Sea.

Should it be remade?

There be no booty here. Cutthroat’s creaky script would need a wholesale overhaul, making a remake redundant; plus, it offers no hint of cherished IP to tempt studios. Pirates Of The Caribbean is a more likely relaunch. And if Karen Gillan leads, as rumoured? Avast ye, me hearties. KH