DRIVEN TO DISTRACTION
ACOLUMN a few weeks ago on motorcycle lane filtering threw up a couple of surprising things. One was how few car drivers realise lane filtering – riding up the middle of lanes when traffic is stationary or slow moving – is legal. The other was how thin- skinned some motorcyclists are when a bit of criticism is directed their way.
A couple of really cranky emails landed saying I obviously had it in for motorbikes because there were far more stupid, dangerous, incompetent, inefficient, unaware, discourteous and selfish road users out there, viz car drivers, and why didn’t I pick on them instead.
To which I say: I don’t, I agree and happy to oblige. As someone doomed to spend hours most days in peak hour traffic commuting the 15km between home and work, I see plenty of stupid, dangerous, incompetent, inefficient, unaware, discourteous, selfish car driving.
The new “rigorous digital education and exam program” that’s going to replace the current multiple choice test for learners in Queensland can only be a good thing, but I still wonder at the efficacy of the 100- hour logbook requirement. Surely, if someone’s a hopeless driver, then all they’re doing is passing their crappy driving habits on to the next generation. So for what they’re worth, here are my tips for the driving challenged and, my fellow frustrated road users, feel free to add to it.
Green lights: When a traffic light turns green, this means go. Particularly if you are first in line, you should be paying close attention, watching for the change so you can accelerate away briskly, aiming to quickly reach the speed limit. It is not OK to move off at a snail’s pace so only six cars get through. And, if you are further back in the line of traffic, you still need to be watching for the green light so you can move off when the car in front does and then you need to KEEP UP with that vehicle, though without ...
Tailgating: Nothing tempts me more to hit the picks and have someone behind have to slam on their brakes than some schmuck sitting so close I can’t see the front of his or her bonnet in my rear view mirror but I can clearly see their stupid, aggressive face. You people are accidents waiting to happen and you’ll be at fault.
Being in the wrong lane: We’ve all be caught out in the wrong lane to turn off but good drivers don’t ( a) just cut off other drivers forcing them to take evasive action; or ( b) bring the traffic in their lane to a halt while they stubbornly sit there waiting to be let in thereby ruining the flow of both lanes. Here’s the deal: if you’ve stuffed up and can’t make the turn or exit without causing havoc, suck it up and continue on until you can. This means instead of every other driver in the vicinity being impacted by your incompetence, you suffer a bit of inconvenience by having to go a little out of your way. And that’s as it margaret. wenham@ news. com. au should be, knucklehead!
Indicating: This is not something to occasionally dabble with, or that’s only done at the last possible minute. This is an imperative so all of us know what each other’s intentions are. I get fed up doing all the anticipating of and compensating for non- indicating tossers, so smarten up people. Also aggravating are those who start indicating while in your blind spot and then move up alongside, so all you see are their apparently inexplicably angry gesticulations and glares as they roar off and start indicating in someone else’s blind spot.
Blocking intersections: I agree with Jeff Kennett. There I said it – but only about those who queue across intersections. He reckoned fines and demerits but I’m leaning towards bulldozers being on standby at certain intersections during peak hour, so offenders’ vehicles can be shunted quickly and roughly out of the way.
When turning left: Remembering to indicate well in advance and move as far to the left as is practicable as you slow down to turn so traffic behind can easily pass without the flow being too disrupted. Note: there’s no need to come to an almost stop for this not very difficult manoeuvre. And do not swing out with a stupid flourish to the right before swinging left as this confuses those behind you and is further evidence you’re a road hog who doesn’t know what the hell you’re doing.
Tunnel vision: It’s not just what’s happening immediately in front of you that’s important, you need to be using your peripheral vision at all times, and all your mirrors. Though by doing this there’s a chance you’ll become aware of the carnage your dearth of other driving skills is causing all around.
Carparks: Ensure the white lines on either side of your car are equidistant and that you are not parked on an angle which also makes it hard for others to park next to you. Also irritating are large car and 4WD owners, many of whom apparently don’t know what “small car”, stencilled in large letters on a space, means. It means, galah, your poncy Land Rover Discovery isn’t supposed to be wedged into it and never mind how rich you are. Finally, don’t park on bloody crests, especially on narrow roads.
Courtesy: It costs nothing. So throw up either a hand of thanks if you’ve been shown consideration by another driver or of apology if you’ve done something stupid or inconsiderate ... again.