Helping men rebound
FORMER Townsville Crocodile and one of the city’s favourite sons, Michael Cedar, has been many things: a father, a brother, husband, basketball star, leader.
But it is his struggles with mental health that have led him to step forward as an advocate for men.
Men’s risk factor for suicide is high: six of every eight suicides in Australia is a father, brother or mate.
Cedar is no stranger to the silence that leads to suffering.
“Basketball became my life from a very young age and it gave me the opportunity to feel confident but I became a completely different person when I was on the floor.” Cedar said. “Growing up in a family with extremely strong male role models, who I never saw show emotion, made me think it wasn’t right to speak up on how I felt.”
A role model to younger fans, he has spoken of how he understands lows, having experienced them.
“My earliest memories of my struggles with mental health I can trace back to my younger years of schooling,” he said.
A passionate indigenous man who takes great pride in his Torres Strait Islander heritage, Cedar admits he was a victim of racism for a long time, which had him questioning his identity. “I had moments in my younger years where I would wonder if my life would be easier if I was white.”
At 16 he sought help for his issues, a decision he labels pivotal.
“People will say, children that young can’t develop mental issues or remember that stuff, or do they really understand what’s being said? “That’s simply wrong and we need to change that mentality. I see a lot of young indigenous people, especially up home, committing crime, adding to the stereotypes that we don’t want, and I fear the effects they are going to have on the next generation of young indigenous kids.”
Saying nothing is often the way men deal with these issues — as it was for Cedar. He had a training regimen which left him with a lot of down time, alone with his thoughts. This was a very dark place.
“( I was) spending money on unnecessary things and drinking al- cohol — far more than I should have,” he said. “On days off, I would often just lie in bed all day. I was struggling and didn’t say anything to anybody. In 2012 I hit tipping point and ended up in the hospital, with fears that I would take my own life.”
This was the end of a career that could have skyrocketed. He would return to complete the 2013 season but admits he had become a shell of the player he had been.
“Unfortunately, I never got a chance to redeem myself in the NBL after the 2013 season,” he said.
“I was given a chance to trial for a spot back with the Crocodiles at the beginning of the 2014 season, but I just shut down and talked myself into forfeiting that opportunity at redemption because my mental space still was not right. I received another opportunity to work out for the Brisbane Bullets when they returned to the league. I was ready to go but fear crept in and I didn’t show.”
Cedar realised that his career at the top was over and his state of mind continued to be a heavy influence on his choices.
He is urging us all to stand united, buck the stigma and take his story — and those like his — as lessons for our future. He wants men to have each other’s backs and understand that “it’s not manly to keep quiet”.
• If you or someone you know needs help, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14
BASKETBALL BECAME MY LIFE FROM A VERY YOUNG AGE AND IT GAVE ME THE OPPORTUNITY TO FEEL CONFIDENT BUT I BECAME A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON WHEN WAS ON THE FLOOR.”