Santa might need camels this time around

Now we’ve learnt so much in the last few days,

Our weather changes life in so many ways, for all of my life I handn’t a clue, but now I know what’s it’s like to live in a barbecue. It’s safe on our beaches to wander about, for there’s no way in this heat the crocs will come out,

and those biting ants in the trees it’s amazing to think,

that they are no longer green, but a glorious pink.

and in the morning I take my clothes straight from the shelves,

in this hot weather they seem to iron themselves,

the people from Heatley are feeling the shame, they now want Cool’ey as their new name. Traffic controllers, coppers, and even the poor tradie,

looking for the cool and somewhere shady,

for could you imagine the horrors and shocks

if they turned up for work, in only their jocks? Some say ‘ don’t you worry it’s only the sun’, but come Christmas Day, I’ll be medium to well done. So let’s give this weather the meteorological flick … for my plastic computer keys are bbbbbeginninggggg toooo stickkkkkk. We are indeed the great Northern Dry Tropics, and we love it.

But over the next few days and weeks there will be a robust meeting in the North Pole Boardroom ( not the Metropole) concerning the flight plan for Santa to Townsville. It seems the reindeer are none too impressed with the reports of heatwave conditions, and that the International Airport is not International any more, lucky to be “Intersuburb”.

In fact, the Giru International is getting more flights, albeit from fruitbats.

Rudolf, who copped his red nose from here in the first place, is unimpressed after getting a parking ticket on his rump in the city heart.

So now it appears unless it cools down to just above sauna conditions the eight reindeer are on strike!

It’s true, Santa’s official sleigh has eight reindeer.

It’s his V8, you might say, and I would be careful if I were one of his reindeer that the V doesn’t end up standing for venison.

In this heat, Santa may end up using camels.

With our aircon bill being more than a dozen pipelines we look forward to the coming white Christmas in Northtown, which is not from Harbourside Coldstores ice, but maybe Fibres and Fabrics cottonwool.

So much joy and Christmas magic in the city this year, and it all begins this weekend.

Oh, yes, and it’s ODD on Saturday, Official Decoration Day . Happy Days PS: Better not forget where you put the sticky tape.