Carty went through hell
Dark days followed Titans sacking
NSW assistant coach John Cartwright has revealed he became an “embarrassed” recluse who considered walking away from rugby league to become a landscaper.
In a raw and emotional interview, Cartwright said he was taunted by “cruel people” when sacked as Gold Coast coach in 2014.
He denied suffering from depression but admitted to experiencing “tough times”.
Cartwright, who coached the Titans for eight years, spent six months unemployed after being axed in August 2014. It wasn’t until February the following year when he was employed again by the North Queensland Cowboys.
Cartwright’s demise was yet another example of the hidden pain suffered by an at times ruthless game.
From the basement, Cartwright is now in the penthouse again.
He is a Blues assistant coach whose side is just 80 minutes from a series victory, as well as an assistant coach at Manly, who surprisingly sit inside the NRL top four.
Cartwright still recalls the impact being sacked had on his personality and demeanour.
“It hits you like a tonne of bricks – they were really tough times. Whether it be right or wrong, you do feel embarrassed,” Cartwright said. “You want to lock yourself away from the world. I did that. Gold Coast is a very small town. I didn’t want to venture outside at all.
“It was silly really because I felt embarrassed. At the time, when the clouds are gathering, there are a lot of cruel people out there.
“When it happened I wasn’t sure whether rugby league was what I wanted to do any more.
“I didn’t have a job for six months – I was disillusioned. It came about really quickly. I wasn’t sure of my future. It really is a cut-throat business.
“I certainly wouldn’t call it depression because I’ve seen people in deep depression. But they were tough times.
“I should have seen it coming. Maybe I stayed a couple of years too long in hindsight.”
Several Gold Coast sponsors offered an unemployed Cartwright work while he also considered returning to landscaping, his first profession during his playing career at Penrith.
Cartwright will forever be grateful for North Queensland, who dragged him from his gloom and gave him a job. It rekindled his passion and love for life and rugby league.
“I got an energy about the game again,” Cartwright said.
Then it was onwards and upwards to a Manly side hurtling towards the finals.
Cartwright is flying again. Testament to his resilience and drive.
He is in camp with the NSW side in Kingscliff trying to plot the demise of Queensland this Wednesday night.
“It’s a privilege to be involved in State of Origin,” he said. “One road leads to another. This is a total bonus.”