Preserving the magic of Christmas
Gold Coast charity Baby Give Back and its founder Carly Fradgley are working overtime to ensure our city’s most marginalised families are able to enjoy the festive season
CHRISTMAS could be cancelled on the Coast this year.
While our city is in full festive season swing, with parties and events at full capacity thanks to our victory over coronavirus, the number of children going without gifts or even essentials is becoming its own pandemic.
With a number of major charity appeals no longer accepting public contributions due to COVID concerns, the supply of donations is shrinking even as demand is escalating.
Carly Fradgley is desperately trying to close that gap … but it’s going to take a Christmas miracle.
As the founder and CEO of Baby Give Back, a charity that works tirelessly to collect and safety check essential baby items donated or purchased for families who are referred via social service agencies, Carly specialises in creating hope … but even she is struggling to remain optimistic this year.
“This Christmas is going to be the first time we have to shut the doors of our warehouse without helping everyone on our list,” says Carly, a mum of two young children herself. “Right now this is the most difficult Christmas we’ve ever seen. We have more families needing essentials than ever before. It’s been a brutal year for families on the Coast.
“We started this year aiming to grow and help 200-250 kids per month by the end of 2020, but in November alone we helped 402 children. In our September quarter, we saw a 32 per cent increase in the number of children needing support versus the same quarter last year.
“Christmas is always a difficult time and so we do Christmas gifts to fill the gaps or help agencies on the fringe. Last year we were asked to provide gifts for 582 children, this year we’re already at 1349 children and we have been warned that the number is going to increase significantly in the coming weeks.
“Already we are at the tipping point of families on our radar that we can help. The fact is that one in six children on the Gold Coast are living in poverty. It’s so easy to think of the Coast as an affluent city with beautiful beaches and tourists, but the need is here. Domestic violence and homelessness are huge issues. What we see is only the tip of the iceberg.
“We never advertise our services because already we have case workers knocking down our door, asking for help for families that they support. I get messages every day saying ‘I know you’re on the brink but these kids need help’. I don’t know how I’m going to say no.
“2020 can’t be the year that Christmas is cancelled.”
Carly says cash donations are desperately needed to help local children, as well as donations of new gifts for teenagers, mums and dads.
She says Baby Give Back is focused on providing judgment-free support for the whole family.
“We believe in dignity and hope. We make sure every donation is beautifully packaged – prams come with teddy bears, toiletries for mums come with a note that says ‘you are worthy’, this is a true gift from the community, not just charity. “We give these families what they deserve, not just what they would accept.
It’s like what Michelle Obama says: ‘what we want for our children, is what we want for all children’.
“That might be one of the silver linings of COVID, actually. People are looking for connection and meaning and we are seeing an increase in volunteering and people wanting to commit long-term to helping those close to home.
“Giving is far more enjoyable than receiving, it’s addictive.”
Carly says she started Baby Give Back when her own children were aged three and one.
Realising she no longer needed her own expensive baby goods – cot, changing table, pram and more – she tried to give them away to her friends. But there were no takers.
Unable to throw away the costly items, she started a charity instead.
“At the time, a lot of my friends were pregnant but they didn’t want my stuff because they wanted to choose their own baby furniture. Op shops don’t really do baby items because it requires so much in the way of safety checks.
“I started doing some research and I came across St Kilda Mums in Melbourne on Facebook and I realised that charity model could be done here. Of course, I thought I’d just set it up in my garage but it just went crazy.
“I was still working parttime as a lawyer, plus with two little kids, it was pretty intense.
“But the need was there from the start, so I couldn’t let it go.”
Since its inception in late 2016, Carly has been able to give up her day job thanks to a private charitable grant and dedicate herself full-time to Baby Give Back, but there still are not enough hours in the day.
She says her work regularly spills over into her own personal life, even affecting the way she parents her own children, now five and seven years old.
“My work as a lawyer has actually been really useful in setting up a successful charity. It has to be run like a business because passion is just not enough.
“I work a lot of hours. I hate that it takes me away from my own kids, but I make a real effort in teaching them and helping them to understand why Mum can’t always be there at pick-up.
“My seven-year-old is starting to get it, which makes me really proud.
“It really affects how we do Christmas as well. Even if I cut down their gift lists, they’re still going to get more than they need or want, I think that’s something every family removed from the poverty line experiences. It’s hard to stop.
“We really want to create a Baby Give Back school holiday program next year so that more kids can understand how lucky they are and how good it feels to help out.”
Carly says despite the mammoth Christmas task ahead of her, she has been helped by some amazing corporate elves on the Coast.
She says Little Scholars childcare founder Jae Fraser had recently partnered with the non-profit, pledging
$15,000 in donations to help 120 children, as well as assistance to cope with the increase in demand from case workers.
As well as the cash donation, Little Scholars will donate 100 boxes of nappies each year, supply volunteer uniforms and host quarterly collection drives at centres.
“It all comes back to community in the end, watching our city connect really makes the hard work worthwhile,” says Carly.
“I have to admit that I’m completely burned out right now, I’m really bad at stopping and celebrating the wins but I’m so humbled by the support we have received.
“Every time things seem too difficult, something happens … a case worker calls to say what a difference we made, or we receive a donation from a family we once helped who are now able to give back themselves, or we partner with a local business and I realise, we’re really doing this.
“It’s super exhausting, but I feel incredibly lucky doing something so immediate and practical, especially this year. People search their whole lives for meaning and purpose.”
While that’s one thing Carly doesn’t need to add to her long list, she’s already feeling the pressure for 2021.
“I don’t think next year will be any easier.
“There will be no less demand and I think everyone is starting to suffer compassion fatigue.
“As much as I would love to see the end of this year, I won’t be staying up until midnight on December 31 … I know I’ll need all the sleep I can get.”
After all, it’s just another way for Carly to give back.
And she’s only too happy to cancel her New Year’s Eve if it means more children can keep their Christmas.
2020 can’t be the year that Christmas is cancelled