Mum stages ‘living funeral’
JAMIENNE Thompson broke down as she gave a eulogy for her sister and when it became all too much her older sibling sprang from the crowd of 300 and held her hand.
It’s an opportunity most never get, but when Kelly Hardy was told she had terminal bowel cancer – and just 12 months to live – she knew she couldn’t miss the biggest celebration of her life.
The 44-year-old staged a “living funeral” and said the only way she could describe it was “insane”.
“It was really nice to see so many people there and know they all turned up for me,” she said. “Everyone should do it. We blaze through life with an idea in our minds of how people perceive us, so it provided a nice adjustment to actually hear about the things you’ve done that have impacted someone’s life.”
Ms Hardy’s daughters, Kyah, 15, and Jordan, 11, kept a brave face as six people delivered heartfelt eulogies for their mother.
Ms Hardy, who has fought cancer for 18 months, said she was grateful that she could be there to support her loved ones in their grief.
“My sister’s speech about losing me went for ages because she kept ending up in tears” she said. “I ended up beside her, holding her hand, which was a real benefit to being at my own funeral. I was reminded how much it meant for her to have the support of an older sister and how I gave her my first car when she got her licence.”
Ms Thompson said the event was confronting, but she was glad it happened.
“One of the biggest regrets when you lose a loved one is not having that opportunity to ensure they knew how loved they are and how much
they mean to you,” she said.
Attending her own funeral was a “classic Kelly move”, according to Ms Thompson, who said her sister’s main motive was to create a stronger support network for those people who would grieve her loss, particularly her girls.
Ms Thompson told the gathered crowd that Ms Hardy was the kind of sister who made life easier.
“I am sure that I was the annoying little sister at times growing up, but I can never remember a time when she ever made me feel it,” she said in her eulogy.
“She was always caring and kind. She watched out for me and always included me.”
Ms Thompson said it was difficult to tell her sister how much she meant to her.
“But I’m hopeful that by her seeing all your faces here today that she will get the idea of just how special she is,” she said.
One of those faces was an old friend who shared one of many inside jokes with Mrs Hardy from their teen years.
“She passed out face down on the lawn at a birthday party,” Ms Hardy said.
“Every time we have caught up since, we’ve done a re-enactment so we did one at the funeral.
“I really got to relive my youth and reflect on all the good times.”
Ms Hardy said the funeral, held at the Broadbeach Cats Australian Football Club, plunged her husband and sister into the football community she was heavily involved in with her daughters.
The Pacific Pines woman has been integral in the growth of female AFL on the Gold Coast since 2017 when she formed and coached a girls’ team at her local club.
She moved to the Broadbeach Cats in early 2019 where she has continued in various volunteer roles, even during her cancer battle.
For the past 12 months, she scheduled her chemotherapy around home games.
“But this year the chemo has taken its toll and so has the cancer, which is spreading throughout my body,” she said. “The hardest part of it all is preparing your kids to live without their parent.
“But they have the football community now and I hope they find comfort in football.
“My 15-year-old, Kyah, has been training with the Broadbeach Cats women’s team and now she has 40 women who I know are there to have her back.”
Ms Hardy said she was proud to be leaving a legacy in the footy community alongside Broadbeach Cats legend Andrew Schumacher, who died the week before her funeral.
The next 12 months for Ms Hardy will be spent making precious memories for her husband Ron and her girls.
A GoFundMe has been set up for the family to assist with home repairs and make the most of their time together.
Mrs Thompson said it hadn’t been decided how they would commemorate her sister once she was gone.