IS YOUR relationship HEALTHY?
IT’S IMPORTANT TO KNOW THAT HELP IS AT HAND
When is the last time you had a relationship health check? While we all know it’s important to attend to our physical health with nourishing food and exercise, it’s also crucial to ensure our relationships score a clean bill of health. With the COVID-19 pandemic placing unprecedented strain on households this year, now may be the right time to look at your relationship.
“We know that while crises certainly affect everyone, they also exacerbate existing social inequalities and reinforce disadvantage,” said Patty Kinnersly, CEO of Our Watch, an organisation that works to prevent violence against women and children. “At this time, we have particular concern for women whose home isn’t safe. Research has found that there’s often a spike in violence against women during major crises and disasters.”
So, what can you do to identify if you’re at risk? According to the national sexual assault and domestic and family violence counselling service 1800RESPECT.org.au, a healthy relationship brings more happiness than stress, and is built on the two pillars of safety and respect.
In a healthy relationship, you will not feel afraid of the other person and will feel comfortable sharing your feelings. This isn’t only applicable to intimate relationships; you’re entitled to feel safe and respected in all your relationships. This includes those with ex-partners, parents, guardians, adult children and other family members, as well as carers, support workers and other people you live with or see regularly, inside and outside the home.
Signs of a healthy relationship include: FREEDOM
• To see family and friends as well as go out on your own
• Make your own decisions about your body, your finances, your friends and where you live and work
• Follow your own cultural practices and religion, or spiritual beliefs
• Pursue your own hobbies and interests
RESPECT
• You listen to each other’s feelings and opinions
• Celebrate achievements
• Don’t insult each other during disagreements
• Don’t control or manipulate one other
NON-ABUSE
• You communicate with each other freely and respectfully
• Have no fear about being honest about how you feel
• Feel safe
• You can say no to sex
All relationships face challenges; it’s common, from time to time, to have disagreements and experience sadness and uncertainty. It’s crucial, however, to remember you should never feel unsafe in a relationship and that abusive behaviour is never acceptable. If relationship behaviour is abusive, you may be experiencing domestic violence (also known as family violence), which may also involve violent behaviour that is not physical, such as psychological or emotional violence, neglect, stalking and financial violence.
RED FLAGS
Warning signs that indicate a relationship is unhealthy include when the other person:
• Tries to control you
• Harms you
• Pressures you
• Is extremely jealous and/or possessive
• Threatens you
• Puts you down