WE’LL ALWAYS HAVE EACH OTHER...
Since her husband’s tragic fall, Kerri-Anne has opened her heart to help and support others doing it tough. Now she’s suffering the most agonising loss of all – the death of her beloved John. Over the past three years she’s shared how the power of love helped bring them even closer... Since John’s accident, the whole thing was a gigantic learning curve. We learned so many new skills – none that you really want – but we just kept going.
When John was in intensive care we both cried and I reminded him more than 30 years ago I said I would follow him to Antarctica to be with him – this was our Antarctica.
I was so pleased when he came home – there’s no place like home.
We had nurses come between 8am and 11am to care for him and then for another two hours at night at 9pm to get him back to bed.
During the day, he was fed and watered, and he started rehab. We set up equipment at home, but there was a lot that needed doing to our place for John. We had to put a lift in, which meant two walls had to be completely rebuilt.
John and I grew up with the sense that “We’ll get through this” and our bond grew so much stronger – we had each other and will always have each other. Slowly we were getting back to being as normal as can be.
You never think your husband is going to end up quadriplegic after a small fall, but it happened. Would I love to have a time machine and be able to go back so that his accident didn’t happen? Of course, but you can’t
‘We had each other and will always have each other’
wallow in self-pity long because it’s not constructive.
[Two years on] I still adore being with my husband, though being a carer isn’t a job one might always choose. The definition is “to watch over” and “be responsible”. Add deep love, affection, exhaustion, frustration and anger, and it might be closer to a day in the life of a carer.
It was a demanding role, but I’m lucky to have a husband I love. He has always been so supportive.
It was John who gave me the nudge to write my book. I think he wanted to keep me busy and with something fun to focus on. He always kept scrapbooks of my career – since 1981 – and he was very sharp and remembered everything, so it was fun to look back at everything – the good and the bad.
We always took each day as it came and we were ultimately thankful we had each other.