Kim Tucci Quins’ mum’s sad marriage breakdown

Ssupermum Kikim didn’t expect raising her eight kids would lead to PTSD and splitting from her husband

When Kim Kimtucci Tucci found out she was expecting quins, her legs started to shake as she tried to come to terms with carrying five babies at once, who were conceived naturally without the aid of fertility drugs or IVF.

Once the shock wore off, she and husband Vaughn, 35, who had hoped to fall pregnant with a longed-for son, started to prepare for what any parent would understand was a massive life change – and an even bigger challenge. It was a daunting prospect, but also a joyful one.

Kim – who had son Kurt, 12, with a former partner – and Vaughn already had two children together, daughters Avia, eight, and Indianna, five, and thought a third baby would complete their family unit.

But as fate would have it, they found themselves expecting quins in what surprised doctors called a one-in-55 million chance. When Kim, 30, gave birth to non-identical quins Keith, Ali, Penelope, Tiffany and Beatrix in January 2016, she knew she would need help.

FEELING THE PRESSURE

A roster of volunteers swung into action, and these young parents appeared to be coping on the surface, despite severe sleep deprivation and sheer exhaustion from caring for eight young children, including five babies.

“The strain started to show in our relationship when the quins were about eight months old,” says Kim.

“It’s hard to describe the sorts of pressure that bringing up five babies puts on a marriage.”

Indeed, the statistics are sobering – more than 50 per cent of multiple birth marriages end in divorce.

‘I thought I’d snap out of it. Nothing has felt stable in my life since’

Kim and Vaughn were determined not to be one of those, but with Kim falling victim to postnatal depression (PND) and Vaughn feeling the strain, their home life became increasingly difficult.

“Three days after giving birth, I got ‘the baby blues’,” says Kim. “I had it with my first three kids, but this time it never went away. I couldn’t stop crying. I was restless and couldn’t concentrate on the simplest of tasks. My mind was everywhere. I thought I’d snap out of it in a few days, but it kept going. As it turns out, nothing has felt stable in my life since. My emotions and feelings are everywhere.”

The couple separated three months ago, after both received treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Kim says she and Vaughn were both too tired and stressed to put any time into their own relationship. Sleep became far more important than communicating.

“Vaughn felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders all the time,” she says.

“He was beyond stressed and always tired. As our relationship became more strained, he would keep himself busy rather than confront the issues.”

With the pair “bottling things up” before exploding at each other like a “volcano”, Kim says they made the decision to split. Vaughn is now living with a family member, visiting the kids up to four times a week, while Kim raises her eight children as a single mum.

ONE DAY AT A TIME

“I’m confident I can make it work by myself, but I try not to think about more than just the day in front of me,” says Kim. “I didn’t fall out of love with Vaughn – it was more a case that we grew into different people. What’s important for me now is to have no dramas and for my kids to be happy.

“I’m not looking for another relationship. Who would want to take on a female with eight children? But I do hope I’ll get my happily-ever-after.”