The Midweek Sun

BLISSFUL MATRIMONY on nurturing,

Couples drilled safeguardi­ng marriage

- BY IRENE SHONE

Married couples were treated to an insightful conversati­on this past weekend at TraveLodge, where they were mainly addressed by renowned counsellor, Ntombi Setshwaelo. The event was organised by Mrs Botswana management, a pageantry that takes keen interest in happy and healthy relationsh­ips and marriage.

For the 79-year-old Setshwaelo, who has been married for 54 years now, marriage is an institutio­n that needs to be celebrated and nurtured by both parties, the wife and the husband. She is concerned that nowadays many marriages are struggling to last long and eventually end in divorce.

Setshwaelo believes that there are qualities and necessary ingredient­s needed for upholding a healthy marriage.

“It is not just about marriage but facets of life,” she said, noting that a healthy marriage should start with self developmen­t, meaning that the couple should have a healthy mind, emotions, spirit, as well as a healthy body. Mental health has become one of the critical health concerns of late, and Setshwaelo duly advises people to take care of their mental health, adding that people should constantly be growing.

“People speak more mindlessly than mindfully,” she said, emphasisin­g that people lack emotional intelligen­ce to live healthier lives. She believes that the principles of Botho, love, respect and openness are crucial in a marriage or in life in general, for people to relate well. Setshwaelo encouraged couples to have empathy towards one another and live the golden rule, because treating the other person the way one expects to be treated in return simply brings gratitude. She shared that everyone owns all qualities shaping up ‘Botho’ and it is only best to be each other’s keeper.

The organiser of the event and Director at Mrs Botswana, Kgalalelo Lesetedi explained that the event was mainly a session to reconnect the married, newlyweds and engaged, to remind them about the goodness of marriage.

She told The Midweek Sun that they do this event annually but expressed concern that while people still show faith in the institutio­n of marriage, divorce rates on the other hand keep rising at an alarming rate.

“There are also cases of Gender Based Violence (GBV) in the family institutio­n including married couples.

It is even dishearten­ing that some people believe that physical abuse is a sign of being loved and take it as a form of discipline,” she said, explaining that they have therefore hosted the session to remind couples about unity, their love, and oneness, in order to promote healthy relationsh­ips within the marriage institutio­n.

Attendants were also drilled on financial literacy by renowned financial planner, Nelson Letshwene who briefly discussed financial awareness. He reminded couples to have financial goals, whether they are married in or out of community of property, as this helps them to use their money wisely. He lamented that there is lack of financial planning in Botswana generally and this affects families.

He said that in as much as people need a counsellor or a family doctor, they equally need a financial planner to help them on the financial aspect of their lives including in financial literacy and debt management, among others. He noted that very often when a married couple faces divorce, there are always fights about finances but if people have financial literacy, such issues could be resolved easily.

 ?? ?? 54 YEARS MARRIED: Ntombi Setshwaelo is a respected speaker on issues of marriage and life in general
54 YEARS MARRIED: Ntombi Setshwaelo is a respected speaker on issues of marriage and life in general

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