Let’s scrap the Deerfoot and start all over

While that may not be possible, it would be the best thing to do

Three years and $ 3.5 million to study Deerfoot Trail? I could tell the city and province in five minutes what’s wrong with Deerfoot, and save them the money. Before I get into the problems, here’s the solution: Scrap the entire road and start again. That’s not feasible, but it truly is the solution.

The Deerfoot is probably the most badly designed road of its type I’ve ever driven, and that includes Chicago’s Dan Ryan Expressway. Out of curiosity, I googled “Dan Ryan” and found a Yelp review by Alex F. of Park Forest, Ill.: “When I was growing up,” Alex writes, “‘ the Ryan’ was a derogatory term used to express anger, frustration and hatred.” Yep, that’s how we Calgarians feel about our Deerfoot all right — anger, frustration and hatred.

Alex says “since it fully reopened after the construction was completed, the Ryan is my favourite expressway in Chicago.” We’re not there yet with Deerfoot. And now that $ 15 million worth of improvements to the Glenmore Trail off- ramp, the interchange at Southland Drive, and the Heritage Drive access are off, we won’t be there for quite a while.

Toss in the new three- year study, the delays incumbent upon that, the costs of whatever the study recommends, the hemming and hawing over said costs and inevitable overruns, possibly some public open houses, and the excruciatingly long construction process, and we may not be there in the lifetime of most Calgarians over age 40.

I hate most of Deerfoot, but the Glenmore section comes in for major loathing. You’re driving south on Deerfoot in the right- hand lane, thinking that an exit sign for Glenmore will come up and you’ll just turn off onto the ramp. Before that, however, you find the road keeps siphoning you to the left, and if you don’t move over, you’ll abruptly find yourself on short notice in the “must exit” lane for some other place you don’t want to go.

Then, nearing the exit for Glenmore west, a righthand lane springs up out of nowhere to the side of Deerfoot; you have to merge into the lane, and you have to do it fast. Of course, it is plugged with cars whose drivers either pretend to be oblivious to your existence or are completely disinclined to let you in. As for the mad loop to get onto Glenmore eastbound — don’t get me started.

Or, you’re driving east on Southland and you want to get onto Deerfoot. Good luck with that. Unless you take your life in your whiteknuckled hands and merge quickly into some middle lane of Deerfoot full of vehicles going about 130, you’re doomed to a forced exit onto Anderson Road in short order. Nightmarish? You bet. Daymarish, too.

Then, there are those craftily designed exits off Deerfoot which serve as both off- ramps and on- ramps. So you’re trying to get off Deerfoot onto another road while someone on that road whose car is parallel with yours, is trying to get onto Deerfoot. That choreography involves some pretty fancy footwork with accelerator and brakes on the part of both drivers. Oh, and there’s a semi coming up fast behind one of you.

So now, due to the sale of some land in the Anderson Road vicinity, all plans are off, and the study of Deerfoot from Stoney Trail to Highway 22X is on, pending finalization of provincial funding. The NDP says the Tories cancelled the improvements when they were still in power, and interim Tory leader Ric McIver says the NDP has just done it, which shows they don’t “care about Calgary at all.”

Ooh, zinger, Ric! Yes, the NDP loves Anthony Henday better than it loves the Deerfoot. Yes, Ric, we’ll be sure to restore your has- been party to power next time. Whatever.

Honk if you hate the Deerfoot. The loudest horn will be mine.