Staying alive

Chemo remains necessary

Hey there, it’s me Kathy. How are you dealing with the snow? We sure don’t need anymore of it.

Keep your fingers crossed that the sun will melt it all.

Remember, spring is just around the corner.

My neighbor have plowed my yard a lot. James and Wayne came over and cleaned the yard on the other days. Thank you guys.

My shoulder is doing OK. It hurts once in awhile but that’s OK. I had my chemo this week. Everything went good. The port worked great.

A couple days later my fever went too high. If I didn’t go to the hospital I knew the nurses would have had a fit. And I didn’t want to wake up dead so I called Wayne and off we went. It wasn’t a long wait but there was a lot of people there. They took x-rays of my lungs. Lots of tries with the needle to get the blood out of my arm and then also out of my port. I sat in a room for a couple of hours before they found me a stretcher in the hall so I got to spend the night in the hall.

My fever went down and they gave me five bags of antibiotics and more in pill form to take home. It was a new experience. They found me a room so they took the bed and all and put me in the room where they put casts on. Well I was in there about 15 minutes when they came and wheeled me back out to the hall where I was. Lucky no one took my parking place.

I don’t know where they would have put me. One thing is for sure, the next time I go to the hospital I’m bringing my toothbrush and hairbrush. In the morning my hair looked like I was trying to start dread locks. My bladder infection is the only thing they could find.

It takes up to five days for the other tests to show if there is anything in the blood.

I didn’t make it to the flea market this week. I woke up and I was feeling so dizzy I had to roll over and go back to sleep.

For some reason people are thinking that I don’t have to have chemo anymore. Well I do every 21 days for as long as my heart and body can stand it. It’s one of the things that is keeping me alive so as long as the doctor says I can take it, I will.

My only wish, with all I’ve been through, was that I could get reconstruction surgery. To me I will never feel sexy again or attractive enough to meet someone who will find me attractive. Everyone is different. Some people say they couldn’t care less if they had a new one or not. When you are stage 2 or under you can get reconstruction but once you go over that you cannot get reconstruction. I am stage 4. There is no stage 5 so I went from stage 2 to stage 4

when the cancer moved into my bones. When the cancer comes back you are moved up to stage 4.

Oh well I will just have to put up with this 10 pound lump of silicon in a boob shaped wrapper for ever.

The false breast is heavy. You can always feel in there. After wearing it for an hour or so it falls down and then you are lopsided.

They came out with stick-on ones but when you take them off, half your skin comes with it. Hurts like crazy to get off and on a hot day. If you are active it will fall off by itself. No such thing as cleavage anymore. I got a new one awhile ago and the fitting lady, after I’d been wearing it for a few months, told me I was wearing it sideways.

You have to buy special bras for the false breast. And you guessed it - because it’s medical they are very expensive. There is no such thing as a breast cancer clothing line at Walmart - nope just at the drug store. But there is a new specialty shop just outside of town. I get two new bras a year and every second year I get a new breast which runs anywhere from $400- $600. I don’t know what I’d do without them. Thank you, Bonnie.

Weight wise - oops - I’ll try harder next week.

Happy birthday this week Steven, hope you had a great day. Yes Debbie, the jam was great. Sharon White is my daughter’s mother-in-law. She’s the lady that got me on to the senna leaf tea, which, by the way, is like magic to your bowels. But you should only drink a small teacup-sized portion, like a china teacup. She sent me a case of the tea this week. Sharon, I can’t thank you enough. That was so sweet of you. I have enough to last me a year.

Well have a great week all and don’t forget, try a little kindness.