Affair trades one problem for another
Q : I’ve been dating this really sweet guy for 18 months. He doesn’t like sex, he’s happy only doing it once a month and he won’t try different positions.
I like sex and love trying different ways. My ex of seven years ago is also in a sexless marriage.
We started hooking up just for sex and it’s awesome.
But part of me feels really guilty because I’ve always been against cheaters and now I’m doing it.
I do care for this guy but I also need good sex.
You and your ex have found a mutual solution but it won’t last.
It can’t because your boyfriend will be hurt/angry/mortified and end the relationship. You’ll then want more than someone else’s husband for occasional sex.
You’ll want a committed partner in more than sex.
The realistic choices:
1. Tell your guy you need a more frequent and adventuresome sex life.
If he’s interested in staying together, he should try boosting his libido (e.g. reading sex manuals together for arousal, seeing a sex therapist, etc.). Or accept that you’re not a longterm match.
2. If nothing changes, end both relationships. It’ll free you to meet someone suited to you and not attached.
TIP OF THE DAY
Cheating on a low-libido boyfriend for better sex with a now married ex is a solution bound to implode.