No priest for funeral ceremony
Will specified woman wanted service from Catholic priest
When Olivia Dunphy’s mother died on Christmas Day, she was shocked. But things got worse when she started planning the funeral.
Multiple calls to Rev. Lazarus Guira, the only Catholic priest presiding over the three churches north of Smokey, weren’t being returned so plans couldn’t be made.
Dunphy’s mother, Kathleen Lewis, 75, was a devout Catholic and she made it clear in her will she wanted to have a funeral with a Catholic priest.
But time was running out because Dunphy’s siblings, who live in other provinces, had to leave by Jan. 2. So they planned a celebration of life for on Dec. 31.
That day they went to Guira’s house in Ingonish to ask if he could come to the ceremony. He wasn’t able to attend, but said he could go to the house in Dingwall the next day to bless the ashes.
People gathered at 3 p.m. on Jan. 1 for the blessing, but Guira didn’t show up.
“I couldn’t believe it was happening, to be honest,” said Dunphy, a licensed practical nurse.
“It was horrific. My dad was upset over my mom’s death, as we all were … it was a lot of stress trying to get things done.”
Dunphy was told that Guira had been sick and had even cancelled two of his three services on Dec. 25. Still, she is not sure why he wouldn’t have returned their calls.
“If he had of just called us back and said he couldn’t do it I could have gotten someone else,” Dunphy said.
Bishop Brian Dunn of the Diocese of Antigonish also thinks Guira could have done more.
“I’m very saddened by the event and that he didn’t do what he should have and what every other parish does,” he said. “He could have put a message on his phone to say call, there are three contacts in those areas, call those people.”
Guira told the Cape Breton Post he was sick with influenza for two or three weeks, which was why he hadn’t returned the calls. There is no paid secretary working for Guira who could have dealt with the matter.
“I do feel bad about this situation. I told them. When I was so sick, I said I would go and I tried my best,” Guira said.
On Jan. 1, when Guira was supposed to bless the ashes, he said he drove to Dingwall but couldn’t get down Quarry Road where the house is because it wasn’t plowed. Guira said he didn’t have the family’s number with him so he phoned Joanne Vassallo, a church volunteer, to tell them.
“I told Joanne the road is not plowed and my car cannot go. Joanne thought I was in Ingonish but I was in Dingwall, close to the post office,” he said.
“I tried my best and because of my sickness and because of that road condition I could not go … people in the three churches knew I was sick.”
Upset that Guira didn’t show, Dunphy called Dunn to make a complaint. She said he was apologetic. On behalf of the family, she requested a donation to the IWK be made on their mother’s behalf and an apology letter sent.
A donation of $100 was collected from the congregation of the three churches, St. Margaret’s, St. Peter’s and St. Joseph’s, but no apology letter was received. Dunphy and her husband both called Dunn again, asking about the donation and the letter.
“He (Dunn) was almost like the priest, putting the ownership on the people who attend the church, like they are responsible, but no they are not,” Dunphy said.
“It’s like everyone is apologizing except for the person who did this … I just want someone to be held accountable.”
Guira said he thought he did apologize when he spoke to the family.
Dunn also said he thought his call after the incident was an apology and that he misunderstood she wanted a letter.
“I take responsibility, the parish takes responsibility for the lack of service that was provided,” he said. “If there is a need for a written apology I would be glad to.”
Lewis requested part of her ashes be buried near her parents in Dingwall and the rest saved to be buried with her husband when he dies. The burial will happen in the spring but Dunphy and her family are apprehensive about getting Guira to preside over it because he “may not show up.”
As for another donation or an apology letter, Dunphy no longer wants it. To her, it wouldn’t feel sincere since she has now told her story to the Cape Breton Post.
“I just don’t want anyone else to go through this.”