Consider the good points of your life
Ellie's Note to Readers: I urge you to share how COVID-19 and the news about it is affecting every relationship we have — with partners, children, parents, friends. Share your personal stories, how you're adapting, and how you're not, so we can find solutions for these unusual times.
Q - We met two years ago when he was embroiled in a messy divorce. Yet I knew early on that I'd marry him.
We even planned a prewedding celebration to announce our intent to friends and family. But COVID-19 had other plans.
I’m 38, have a great job, never married (by choice), dated a lot. I moved in with him (and his five-year-old son — he shares custody with his ex).
My fiancée loves kids, and we wanted to have a child together. I hoped we’d be married before I got pregnant.
We booked a favourite restaurant months ago for the event that would make our intentions public.
Meanwhile, he’d been having setbacks in his divorce case.
Now, everything’s been changed by the virus pandemic.
Our festive event is cancelled, and the courts are behind in cases.
We have no idea when he’ll be free for us to get legally married. I’m disappointed but this is definite: We’re both fully committed to staying together.
And I’m pregnant.
— Keeping Score
A- Throw away your score card, you’re the lucky one. All you’ve suffered from COVID19 is a minor setback to your plans, especially since you have the joy you so desired of getting pregnant.
While 277,485 people globally had died from the coronavirus COVID-19 outbreak (at the time of my writing this), stealing breath from the most vulnerable and health-compromised, for countless others it’s created fear, isolation, and financial hardship.
Yet some lucky others have only been touched on the peripheries of daily life.
If you’re working and earning a decent living, have a companion, partner or family with you and/or in close communication, you’re truly lucky.
You’re experiencing a time of history. Hopefully, it’s one which will eventually improve the future. You’ll undoubtedly tell your children all about it one day.
And you’re surviving, even thriving, in love and support.
FEEDBACK - Regarding the man who wants to be generous but doesn’t want to volunteer and risk bringing the virus home to his elderly aunt whom he’s looking after: Reader – “He could:
• register with https://www. sparkontario.ca they have opportunities to check in with people by phone,
• contact the office of his MPP or city councillor — both of mine put me in touch with such opportunities.”
Reader No. 2 – “Some friends and I have been making sandwiches for The Good Shepherd. We’re provided the food, condiments and baggies/ plastic wrap. We make sandwiches - two or three loaves’ worth on Monday and Thursday. They’re picked up Tuesday and Friday mornings.
If he called shelters and asked for ways to help, they’d value his time.
ELLIE’S TIP OF THE DAY
COVID-19 will leave painful memories but those who are lucky can learn from its fierce lessons.