Caregivers also need care
Offering assistance can make a big difference in someone’s life
Those who care for a person living with dementia often spend most of their time making sure all of that person’s needs are met.
Who though, is taking care of the caregiver?
Often their needs get overlooked. If you want to help your friend who is taking care of a person living with dementia, it might be simpler than you think.
It takes just a short message:
“Hey, you up for a coffee? I’ll drive!”
“Hey, do you need a break?” “Hey, can I pick up your groceries for you?”
These simple questions can mean the world to a caregiver who might be feeling stressed and isolated. Caregivers are often reluctant to ask for help, but relieved when it is offered.
“Someone has remembered you. They have given you a break. They have taken you out of your new and demanding world even if it is for just an hour, it buoys you up! You return feeling stronger and able to carry on,” said Wendy from Baddeck, who is a care partner within her family. “It’s the simplest of gestures and one we often take for granted.”
For a caregiver like Wendy, a short outing for coffee is much more than just getting a daily dose of caffeine. It’s a break, a chance for much needed social interaction, and an opportunity to relax for a moment.
Caregivers often have many other responsibilities as well. Maybe it’s their children, their job, bills or meals — the list can be endless. Offering them a break can make a huge difference to them.
“She would go to mom’s two evenings a week and they would watch her favourite game show, go for a walk or a drive, or just have a coffee,”
“Caregivers often have many other responsibilities as well. Maybe it’s their children, their job, bills or meals — the list can be endless.”
said Darlene from Sydney Mines, describing what her mother’s best friend did to help her. “It was a wonderful help for me because I knew on those evenings, I was free to focus solely on my children and get caught up on other things. My mom loved it and it gave me the ‘pause’ I needed at that time.”
It doesn’t take a lot.
If your friend is caring for a person living with dementia, reach out to them today. Ask them if you can take them out for coffee (even if you have to hit the drive-thru and sit in the car instead of going inside). Maybe they’d like to go out with you for a walk to get out of the house and get fresh air. See if you can give them a few hours of respite. Ask if you can take a task or two off of their plate, like picking up groceries, walking the dog, or taking the car to the mechanic. They’ll appreciate it more than you might imagine.
For the caregivers in your life who spend so much of their days caring for others, your thoughtfulness to check in and make sure they know they are not alone is something that can go a long way during this journey they are on.
Catherine Shepherd is the education and outreach coordinator for the Alzheimer Society of Nova Scotia in Cape Breton. She lives in North Sydney and happily spends her day providing resources and support for people on the dementia journey. To reach the society, call toll-free 1-800-6116345.