‘I can still see the look of shock in the children’s eyes. They had witnessed a particularly violent episode and they were scared to lose their mother.’

Victims of domestic violence share stories of survival in the hope of helping others break their silence.

Their words are unedited. Few give their full names. But their online messages reveal with eloquence and candour just how it feels to live through, and then leave, a violent relationship.

As part of a 12-day, international campaign to draw attention to violence against women, Quebec women’s shelters launched a website last week inviting victims of violence, along with shelter workers, police officers and others with a front-row seat to the horror show that is conjugal violence, to share their thoughts.

For Nathalie Villeneuve, president of the Regroupement des maisons des femmes victimes de violence conjugale, the website is important for two reasons.

First, she hopes victims of conjugal violence who have not yet reached out for help will read it and recognize that they are “not crazy, that it is not their fault and that they are not alone.” She wants them to know about the 16 women’s shelters that exist on the island of Montreal, where women and their children can go for shelter, or just for advice on how to safely leave violent relationships.

Secondly, she hopes the wider public will read these testimonials and realize that conjugal violence is not just about the nameless, faceless victims they read about in crime stories.

“We are hoping people will read these testimonials, share the link to the site on their Facebook page, talk it up and encourage people to participate,” she said.

In Quebec, 12 Days of Action to End Violence Against Women, which began Nov. 25 and ends Friday, focuses on the fact women are still not treated as equal to men and “to pretend otherwise is to put women in danger,” Villeneuve said.

Despite those who point out that men are victims, too, Villeneuve notes that because of systematic oppression of women, the vast majority of victims of violence are still women. Eighty per cent of victims of conjugal violence are women, 93 per cent of conjugal homicides are women and 96 per cent of victims of sexual assault are women, according to Quebec’s Public Safety Department.

The 12 Days of Action concludes with a Dec. 6 rally in commemoration of the 14 women killed in 1989 shootings at Montreal’s École Polytechnique. The rally will be at the Palais de justice de Montréal at 12:30 p.m.