Arguing politics with fiancée’s mom is a surefire recipe for disaster
Dear Annie: My soon-to-be mother-in-law and I are in an all-out war via social media.
It all started when she posted an article about politics that was full of blatant lies and misinformation. I commented with a few links so she could do further research and see that she was totally wrong. She replied by saying that I am young and naive and my sources were biased. I doubt she even actually read them.
We went back and forth all day, and eventually I told her that she is an idiot if she truly believes what she was saying. She told me to talk to her again when I am ready to grow up. This was about two weeks ago.
My fiancée, “Becky,” is not happy with me, to put it mildly. While she doesn’t agree with her mom, she’s furious that I would be so disrespectful. I feel that her mom was the first one to be disrespectful, by telling me I’m naive.
Becky wants me to call her mom and apologize, but I’m still so annoyed with this woman. On principle, I refuse to do it. I wasn’t wrong, and I’m not backing down. I know you have to choose your battles, but I think this one is worth fighting. Annie, what do you think? In the Doghouse
Dear Doghouse: I’m not one for name-calling, but I will say that if there’s an idiot in this scenario, your future mother-in-law isn’t it. You’re not winning any battles, just losing the respect of your future in-laws. That’s not to mention all the strain you’re putting on your fiancée. If you want to debate politics, join a forum or call your representative or yell at the TV; do whatever it takes to get it out of your system. Just don’t do it with your partner’s family.
Dear Annie: This is in response to the letter from “Sad and Fed Up,” whose husband drinks every night and has refused for years to have sex with her. You advised her to go to Alcoholics Anonymous, but AA is for alcoholics, not for their family members (unless she can find an “open” meeting). Al-Anon is specifically for the friends and family members of those who are affected by the drinking of another person. That is where she will find the help and support she needs. My husband also drank every night (and sometimes all day, as well), until he died a few years ago, but I have made a good life for myself with the help of my wonderful Al-Anon friends. Helped by Al-Anon
Dear Helped: Thank you for correcting that. That was an error. Al-Anon is a wonderful organization, and I recommend it for anyone who has a problem drinker in his or her life. Find meetings in your area at http://www.al-anon.org.
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