Celebrating anglophones in Quebec
Good news as a small slice of anglo culture has been adopted by Quebec francophones
Allo anglophones, allophones, xylophones and other phones.
Here is the latest report on the Quebec anglo, an obscure tribe of Quebecers practically unknown to the outside world.
Information is slowly dribbling out about us that will some day help sociologists assemble a portrait, but here is what we know for now: Origins and population: The Quebec anglo is celebrating its 40th birthday as an official species this year. It was born in 1977, under Bill 101 — which took the once-obscure academic word “anglophone” and transformed it into a people.
The minister behind this transformation was PQ language doctor Camille Laurin, who must reluctantly be regarded as the father of our people.
Our exact population is somewhat uncertain. There was great excitement this year when Statistics Canada mistakenly reported an incredible surge of 57,000 new anglophones in the 2016 census. This included booming new communities in Rivière-du-Loup and Rimouski, where Homo Anglophonus had rarely been spotted before.
For weeks, theories were rampant: was there a vast secret English-speaking exodus from Trumplandia? Were anglo refugees sneaking across the Ontario border to settle in rural Quebec? Had we had 50,000 kids we didn’t know about?
In the end Statistics Canada issued an embarrassing correction showing we anglos haven’t grown much at all. Our community is still officially 600,000 strong, when you just count native English-speaking anglos.
However, at least 350,000 more Quebecers speak English at home — and are sort of anglophone allophones, boosting our unofficial numbers to almost a million.
So hello, allos. Language: There was good news for the English language in Quebec last month, as a small slice of anglo culture was adopted by Quebec francophones.
The term “un grilled-cheese” was officially declared a French word by the Office québécois de la langue française.
The province’s language watchdog had previously only recognized “un sandwich de fromage fondu” — but “le grilled-cheese” proved too popular to suppress. It’s found everywhere from the renowned Quebec City Resto La Mama Grilled Cheese to the province’s annual Festival du Grilled-cheese.
The change was what internet cheese wags called “Gouda news” and a brie-lliant addition for the grater benefit of Quebec.
“Le grilled-cheese” was one of several Anglicisms deemed acceptable by the Office, because they are too widely used by francophones to stop. For instance, you may now say “un cocktail” instead of “un coquetel” or “baby-boom” instead of “bébéboum” — and you can play softball instead of “balle-molle.”
Other generally accepted Quebec Anglicisms include “un hot dog,” “un smoked-meat” and the ubiquitous “le bagel,” which the Office had long insisted be spelled “bageul.”
Likewise, no Quebec tennis player has ever hit the officially encouraged “coup d’écrasement” listed in Quebec’s dictionnnaire terminologique. They always hit a “smash.”
Adopting some English words is only fair, as we anglos mix more French terms into our English conversation all the time.
Many of us haven’t used the Ontario words “corner grocer” for decades and have long forgotten the English terms for garderie, CSLC, the SAQ and the SQ.
I don’t even know how to order a bavette, or an allongé in English.
Factor in our growing local homegrown vocabulary like the autoroute, the métro, the Turcot, The Glen, The Jewish and the Quartier des Spectacles and we anglos increasingly speak our own distinct dialect.
I was talking to a friend who works at the new superhospital recently and she said; “There’s a really good dep at the Vic in the Glen.” That’s a sentence no one would understand except a Montreal anglo — and good luck finding a translation in any dictionary on Earth. Lifestyle: More than 80 per cent of us are now reportedly bilingual, though we still press 9 for hospitals, pharmacies and cable TV technicians. We are increasingly fluent in construction sign language from “Rue Barrée” and “route alternatif facultatif” to “TRAVAUX MAJEURS SUR L’ÉCHANGEUR TURCOT! — EN PÉRPETUITÉ.”
We have always consumed more alcohol than other English-Canadians according to studies, but a surprising recent report by Éduc’alcool found that anglos now drink more heavily and more often than francophones (almost twice a week, to francophones’ 1.5 times).
Why does the anglo imbibe more? Have we been converted from teetotalling Canadians to Quebec party animals, who are more Québécois than the Québécois?
Or do we drink because we are a nation of post-referendum alcoholics — who are always nervously watching our Ps and PQs? Voting: We are growing grumpy with the Couillard government, so much so that one summer poll showed anglo support for the CAQ party at 25 per cent. That is, until we saw that poll and got nervous — so anglo support for the CAQ fell to nine per cent in the next poll.
Despite last week’s big CAQ byelection win, I suspect that next election, most anglos will be supporting the Liberals again in what internet cheese wags would call:
“A feta accompli.”