2017 NON-TRUMP NEWS ROUNDUP.

HERE’S THE NON-DONALD NEWS FROM 2017 YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED BY TRISTIN HOPPER

A MAN BROKE THE WORLD RECORD FOR THE LONGEST RUN WHILE ON FIRE

Do not try this at home, but to raise money for a cancer charity British stuntman Antony Britton decided to light himself on fire and run across a field. When the flaming daredevil was finally doused with fire extinguishers, he had broken two world records: The fastest time for a burning man running 100 metres (24.58 seconds) and the longest documented distance ever run by a man on fire (204.23 metres). “It was very exciting,” reported Britton.

PRINCE PHILIP, USAIN BOLT, BLACK SABBATH AND DANIEL DAY-LEWIS ALL RETIRED

Speaking of running, you won’t be seeing Usain “History’s Fastest Man” Bolt on the track ever again. In August, the 31-year-old Jamaican sprinter announced the end of his career at the World Championships in London. Black Sabbath played their last-ever show on Feb. 4. Acclaimed English actor Daniel Day-Lewis announced his retirement from the stage and screen, reportedly to become a dressmaker. And Prince Philip — who is 31 years older than Britain’s official retirement age — announced he will no longer be attending public events.

THEY INVENTED A NEW CHOCOLATE (THERE ARE FOUR TYPES NOW)

For 80 years, the world has known only three officially sanctioned types of chocolate: Milk, dark and white. This year, chocolatier Barry Callebaut announced that they had successfully manufactured an entirely new chocolate they’ve called “Ruby.” The new chocolate is naturally pink and reportedly carries a fruitier taste than conventional chocolate. Callebaut was guarded about how they created the new food, although they claimed it was due to a mysterious “Ruby” cocoa bean — a variety of cocoa that does not actually exist. Further digging by chocolate blogger Sharon Terenzi, however, concluded that ruby chocolate is likely made by skipping the fermentation step used to make traditional chocolate.

QUEEN ELIZABETH II BECAME THE WORLD’S OLDEST HEAD OF STATE

With the forced retirement of 93-year-old Zimbabwe dictator Robert Mugabe, the title of “oldest head of state” passed to 91-year-old Elizabeth II. With no obvious health problems, she is now on track to become the oldest head of state ever — a record set in 1657 by 97-year-old Order of Malta leader Giovanni Paolo Lascaris.

THE WORLD’S DRIEST PLACE BLOOMED

Aside from a few corners of Antarctica, Chile’s Atacama Desert is generally seen as the world’s driest place, chalking up zero annual precipitation as a matter of course. In August, some rare and unexpected rain speckled the area, immediately turning the desert’s barren landscapes into brilliant carpets of flowers.

WE FOUND A NEW CONTINENT

Seven continents has been the recognized standard since the time of Captain James Cook. That is, until an extensive 2017 survey confirmed that New Zealand sits atop its very own (largely underwater) continent. Researchers think that Zealandia was once part of Australia, but broke free about 80 million years ago and proceeded to sink more than a kilometre beneath the Pacific Ocean thanks to thousands of years of epic geologic violence.

A SPACE ROBOT WAS ORDERED TO MARTYR ITSELF FOR THE GOOD OF HUMANITY

At the moment Cassini sent its last, faint transmissions from the searing heat of Saturn on Sept. 15, the probe had been in space longer than some NASA interns had been alive. Launched in 1997, the spacecraft had spent 14 years studying the ringed planet, after a meandering trip through the solar system that had swung it past both Venus and Jupiter. This year, the spacecraft was ordered to destroy itself by plunging directly into Saturn’s atmosphere. And Cassini’s martyrdom had a very noble purpose: Scientists did not want to risk the spacecraft crashing into one of Saturn’s moons. Several of those moons remain top candidates for future human settlement and mission planners didn’t want to accidentally pollute them with earth microbes that may have hitched a ride aboard the probe.

THE WORLD’S OLDEST GOLF CLUB FINALLY DECIDED TO ADMIT WOMEN

Founded in 1744, Scotland’s Muirfield holds the record as the world’s oldest verified golf club. They also have a pretty well-established fear of girls and entered the 21st century staunchly refusing to allow women to hit the links. In the end, it took outside pressure to convince them otherwise. After the 273-year-old policy prompted the British Open to ban Muirfield as a venue, members suddenly had a change of heart and voted 80 per cent in favour of allowing the fairer sex to play golf.

TWO COUNTRIES ELECTED GAY LEADERS AND FIVE LEGALIZED GAY MARRIAGE

There have only been five openly gay national leaders in modern history. Of those, two were elected in 2017. Ireland, which decriminalized homosexuality only in 1993, saw gay man Leo Varadkar appointed as prime minister. Even more notable was Serbia. Anti-gay sentiment is so strong in the Balkan republic that, as recently as 2013, Serbian LGBT activists were forced to cancel pride parades due to security concerns. This year, Serbia’s parliament elected Ana Brnabic as both its first female and its first gay prime minister. The year 2017 also saw five more countries legalize same-sex marriage, including Germany, Finland and Australia.

WE FOUND THE OLDEST HUMAN ANCESTOR AND THE OLDEST EVIDENCE OF LIFE

It was a gala year for discovering very old things in the ground. In January, Chinese geologists reported their discovery of a 540-million-year-old specimen of Saccorhytus coronarius — a microscopic creature, pictured, whose mouth and anus were the same thing. It may not seem like much, but evolutionary biologists believe it to be the ancestor of the fish that begat the reptile that begat the mammal that begat humans. Meanwhile, in Canada, Japanese researchers cracked open some four-billion-year-old rocks and found evidence of microbes that they say are the earliest evidence of life on earth.

CHINA ANNOUNCED PLANS TO BUILD A MEGACITY THREE TIMES LARGER THAN NEW YORK

To clear up overcrowding in Beijing, Chinese officials announced in April they would simply be building another Beijing about 100 km to the south. The Xiongan New Area, to be built in a district that is now little more than a handful of rural villages, is planned as an ultramodern metropolis that will eventually swell to 2,000 square kilometres, an area three times bigger than the five boroughs of New York City.

AUSTRALIA SUFFERED A POLITICAL CRISIS BECAUSE MEMBERS OF PARLIAMENT DIDN ’ T KNOW THEY WERE CITIZENS OF OTHER COUNTRIES

Under Australian law, nobody can sit in parliament if they hold citizenship to another country. In a 2017 political crisis, seven sitting parliamentarians were suspected of holding dual citizenship. Five lost their seats as a result, removing the parliamentary majority of the ruling Liberal Party. Several ousted politicians did not even know they were foreign citizens, including Larissa Waters, pictured, whose brief time in Winnipeg as a baby qualified her as a Canadian. Meanwhile, it’s worth noting many of Australia’s commonwealth partners, including Canada and New Zealand, do not have rules against dual national parliamentarians.